A broken and contrite heart

An excerpt from the Responsorial Psalm in today’s Mass for the Friday after Ash Wednesday:

Psalm 51:19

“A crushed spirit is a sacrifice to God. A contrite and humbled heart, O God, you will not spurn.”

via Catholic Public Domain Version of the Sacred Bible.

A crushed spirit is the person who is aware of their sins, is wounded by them and who has demonstrated sincere humility in desiring to repent of them.

Offer up the pain of your remorse and your dread of being separated from God by the sins. Lift up your heart and soul and pray for forgiveness. If you do a thorough (“fearless and searching”) examination of conscience you can often get through to the root of repeated and consistent sins. Go to Confession frequently throughout Lent to aid in ridding yourself of the root causes of sin.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Take up the Cross every day

This is an excerpt from the Gospel of today’s Mass for the Thursday after Ash Wednesday.

Luke 9: 23

“Then he said to everyone: “If anyone is willing to come after me: let him deny himself, and take up his cross every day, and follow me.”

via Catholic Public Domain Version of the Sacred Bible.

“Take of his (or her) cross” … “every day.” Not just when you want to, but daily. The crosses that you “take up” are the daily troubles, trial and tribulations that everyone gets, and that we used to drink over to cope with (or escape from).

The deny the cross and run from it is not to be a follower of Christ. And especially nowadays when in many parts of the world to be a follower of the Jesus is to incur a humiliating death penalty.

In the Lenten season we are to be especally vigilant and dedicated in “taking up the Cross.” Are you accepting the Crosses you have to bear?

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

St. Onesimus

February 16th is the feast day of a somewhat obscure Saint, which is odd as he figures prominently in a Letter of St. Paul.

In St. Paul’s Letter to Philemon, the Apostle reveals that Onesimus, a slave of Philemon who escaped, possibly with stolen property of his master’s, has been with him for some time and has been of valuable service. Onesimus has also been baptized and as such is now a brother in Christ to Paul and Philemon, as the latter is also a Christian. However Paul is convinced that due to the Christian charity that Philemon has shown in the past, he will take back Onesimus and greet him as a brother, equal in dignity and will not punish Onesimus or re-enslave him.

And so Onesimus is sent back to Philemon by Paul, with this Letter as a sort of greeting and passage.

I’ve always been intrigued by this. Imagine you’re Onesimus. You’ve been a slave. There must have been a reason why you escaped. Was Philemon cruel? Or did you just have an instinctive aversion to being considered property of another? You just saw an opportunity to leave and took it? Anyway, the punishment for escaped slaves was most likely death. Probably painful and not quick if you’re also guilty of theft. And now your new friend, whom you’ve been serving and who has treated you like an equal, a person, is sending you back to your old master. With full confidence that Philemon’s Christianity is all that is standing between you and a painful termination.

Would you want to return?

I didn’t think so. Me neither.

But Onesimus did. He probably did not go willingly, but apparently his faith in the Gospel of Jesus that Paul preached was enough to convince him that it is the right thing to do. So Onesimus’ faith overcame his possible very strong natural lack of inclination to return.

I think for that reason St. Onesimus should be of interest to alcoholics and addicts. Not that he was one, but we all do not want to do the things that we have to. Our addictive personality may make this disinclination stronger in us than in most people. “Normal” people can overcome unwillingness seemingly by just going ahead and doing the thing. But we have to use our spiritual toolkit to convince ourselves to “get going” and do the thing. We have our daily meditations, slogans and other aids to get us to do things that other people just do.

St. Onesimus can be our aid in this. Although I don’t think he is the patron saint of anything, he should be the Patron Saint of People Who Really Do Not Want to Do the Things That They Really Have to Do. ( I have to find a shorter, catchier term. “Patron Saint for People Who need Courage?” Still rather long…)

Read more on Saint Onesimus at SQPN.

Onesimus

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

An Exhortation to Persevere from the Book of Sirach

While doing my morning meditations today I read the following passage from the Old Testament “Wisdom” Book, the Book of Sirach (Chapter 2, Verses 1-13). I found it to be a very good and hopeful exhortation to persevere in keeping faith with the Lord; for those who persevere to the end will be saved (as it says elsewhere in Scripture):

“Son, when you apply yourself to the service of God, stand in justice and in fear, and prepare your soul for temptation.
Humble your heart, and persevere. Incline your ear, and accept words of understanding. And you should not hurry away in the time of distress.
Endure steadfastly for God. Join yourself to God, and persevere, so that your life may increase in the very end.
Accept everything that will happen to you, and persevere in your sorrow, and have patience in your humiliation.
For gold and silver are tested in fire, yet truly, acceptable men are tested in the furnace of humiliation.
Believe God, and he will restore you to health. And straighten your way, and hope in him. Observe his fear, and grow old in it.
You who fear the Lord, wait for his mercy. And do not turn away from him, lest you fall.
You who fear the Lord, believe in him. And your reward will not be taken away.
You who fear the Lord, hope in him. And mercy will approach you, to your delight.
You who fear the Lord, love him. And your hearts will be illuminated.
My sons, consider the nations of men, and know that not one of them hoped in the Lord and was confounded.
For who has remained in his commandment and been abandoned? Or who has called upon him, and yet he despised him?
For God is upright and merciful, and he will forgive sins in the day of tribulation. And he is the Protector to all those who seek him in truth.”

via Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

There are countless “Daily Meditation” books available for people to use. But the very best is one you probably already have, the Bible! Particularly the so-called “Wisdom” books (Job, Psalms, Wisdom, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Song of Songs and Sirach). All can be taken and read daily in little doses.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

But I’m not drinking over it (UPDATED)

I live in western New York State, in the USA, and this past week we’ve been suffering through a near-Apocalyptic snowstorm. Depending upon the location, various areas have received at least three to seven feet of snow (that’s one to over two meters).

All over the area, people are coming together to offer assistance; neighbors helping neighbors, not waiting for the government to help (which is admittedly limited and strained due to the severe conditions). Facebook in particular has been extremely helpful in this grassroots mutual aid effort; there are several Groups formed with the express purpose of organizing and coordination offers of help with requests for aid.

I can’t do much, trapped in my house. All I am doing is posting and resharing links and the like.

But, the point of this post is that I am a sober alcoholic and I don’t want a drink.

Not at all.

And I have an 800 foot (250m) long driveway buried in 3-5+ feet of snow that’s probably too hard for our snowplow friend to plow with his pickup. And he drives plows for the town, and so he’s been working around the clock plowing township streets, so who knows if/when he’ll be available?

And I haven’t been to work in a week. And I may not get paid for this week unless I either use whatever vacation/personal time I have remaining, or otherwise hope we all qualify for FEMA funds (if/when they become available) and that covers lost wages or perhaps if the State Labor Dept has some form of Unemployment Insurance for the week. And there’s no guarantee I can get out of my driveway on Tuesday when I’m next scheduled to go to work. 

And I have to worry about our roof collapsing what with all the snow on it, getting heavier with the added rain expected today/tomorrow.

And I have to be concerned about water. We get ours from a well, but that tastes strange despite being fit for consumption. And so we get drinkable water in jugs, which are getting low. I’ve taken to collecting snow and boiling it to use for my own purposes (i.e. COFFEE) so that my wife can have the good water. We have been wanting to get one of those “Big Berkey Water Filter” contraptions to ease our dependence on this, but money is stretched.

And I have to worry about power outages; what with all the snow out there, and the expected rain, trees may collapse, pulling down power lines.

And I have no need for a drink, nor even want one.

I am not a martyr, so don’t interpret this to be, “See what a good ex-drunk I am.” Not a boast, just a statement of facts to perhaps inspire others who have issues and things and they reach for a drink to ease the suffering. this is what happens a lot in AA meetings; people discuss their issues, and declare “I didn’t have to take a drink over it.”

UPDATE: The snow is almost gone; almost right after the storm ended, temperatures started to rise and much of the snow melted. Although we had difficulty in getting out of the driveway, we managed. The friend of ours who I mentioned does our plowing isn’t able to for the time being as his pickup with the plow has something wrong with it. Hopefully this winter won’t be bad and weather cooperates and we can get out when we need to.

There was another “warm up” yesterday; you’ll never know that there was a major snowstorm a few weeks ago, although there are signs of it in fallen trees and tree limbs. Some areas were hit by heavy flooding, be we didn’t suffer that.

I should get paid for the week I lost at work; my boss said he will submit a request to use my available vacation or personal time (I was planning on asking him to do that, so it’s all good!)

And thus the appeal I had included in the original post isn’t needed, but I’ll remind you in case you’re encouraged to support the work of this blog that there’s a PayPal link up top, right below Matt Talbot’s picture, where you can donate money. I do wish to thank those who did donate, your contributions will be put to good use. Prayers are always appreciated, too!

Thank you!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Be transformed!

The Second Reading from Today’s Mass of the Twenty-second Sunday in Ordinary Time has one of my favorite Scripture passages, and the first one I ever attempted to memorize. To me, it is at the heart of being a person in recovery:

Romans 12:2 “Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect.”

In recovery, we are essentially becoming transformed. We live by the principles of our recovery program (be it Twelve Step or something else) and if we are Christian, we seek out what the Church has to offer people struggling with their addictions. And one key thing, and this is something I’ve stressed from time to time: you don’t conform to this age, you do not seek value in the so-called “morals” of the World. They do not offer anything of substance and certainly they do not offer anything good for your salvation.

In this “transformation” and our “renewal” we gain the capacity to discern what is the will of God, “what is good and pleasing and perfect.”

How to discern the Will of God? Reading Sacred Scripture is one way. In the Gospel Reading for today’s Mass, Jesus tells His disciples:

Matthew 16:24-27 “Whoever wishes to come after me must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me. For whoever wishes to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. What profit would there be for one to gain the whole world and forfeit his life? Or what can one give in exchange for his life? For the Son of Man will come with his angels in his Father’s glory, and then he will repay all according to his conduct.”

Mass Readings via USCCB.

Again, “taking up the Cross” is essential to our recovery. We do not seek to run away from our troubles, all of the problems, big or small, that life throws at us daily. That is what we did while drinking. Everyone has troubles, it is a fact of human existence. We now have to tools to effectively deal with them, and perhaps even people around us who can assist us.

But it’s more than that. It’s building a new life in recovery, and becoming a better follower of Jesus Christ! Our lives today are better than when drinking. And even better than before we first picked up a drink due to our “renewal” and “transformation.”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Walk in the dark valley

The Responsorial Psalm for Monday of the Fifth Week of Lent is:

Even though I walk in the dark valley I fear no evil; for you are at my side.

via USCCB.

We have all been there, this stroll through the dark valley, when all is dark and we feel that there is no hope. We may have reached our “bottom,” that “jumping off place” where we know that if we continue drinking we will die, and if we don’t drink might be afraid to live and wish for death. Or we could be sober for quite a while but are feeling “thirsty” and we are unsure of how to get back on the beam.

We are not alone. The Lord is with us; He stands at the ready, able to help us if only we ask. If we nurture this relationship with Jesus, we shall “fear no evil,” for no threat about us can possibly discourage us from the path we are to tread.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Go as the Lord directs you

An excerpt from the First Reading of today’s Mass for the Second Sunday of Lent is from Genesis 12:4:

“Abram went as the LORD directed him”

via USCCB.

Abram, later renamed Abraham, goes forth with the promise that he will be made the father of great nations with innumerable descendants.

While that may be appealing for some, we alcoholics have to shoot for a more humble and modest goal: that of not drinking and staying sober. If we follow the direction of God’s will that we can discern from our prayer life, scripture meditations and talks with spouse, family and friends (and perhaps 12 Step Meetings), we can be assured of achieving this goal. There may be slip ups along the way, but we can get back up with the help of God’s graces and resume or course along the road of happy destiny.

So, pray on it and “Go as the Lord directs you.”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Love Your Enemies

In the Gospel Reading for Saturday of the First Week of Lent (I had meant to post this yesterday, but was having connectivity issues with the blog)

(Matthew 5:43-48),

Jesus said to his disciples:

“You have heard that it was said,

You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.

But I say to you, love your enemies,

and pray for those who persecute you,

that you may be children of your heavenly Father,

for he makes his sun rise on the bad and the good,

and causes rain to fall on the just and the unjust.

For if you love those who love you, what recompense will you have?

Do not the tax collectors do the same?

And if you greet your brothers and sisters only,

what is unusual about that?

Do not the pagans do the same?

So be perfect, just as your heavenly Father is perfect.”

via USCCB.

This admonition by Jesus is a very difficult one for us alcoholics to muster the courage for. And yet I think it is essential for our long-term recovery. It is difficult indeed to “love your enemy,” but if we persist it hating “our enemies,” the festering resentments that this implies will only threaten our recovery.

It is hard. I have trouble mustering the courage to forgive those who have hurt me. I periodically go through forgiveness exercises and review my feelings towards people who have hurt me, and struggle to cut loose the emotional bonds to the hurt. It is one thing to pray and forgive them, another to no longer feel the pain they have caused. That, I think, is a sign that forgiveness has settled in, and that the power your “enemies” has over you is over. Your forgive, and you subsequently no longer replay the tapes in your head of the hurt. The bonds are cut and it is behind you. Whether you reconcile is another matter.

And so you go on. Although forgiveness is hard, it is neccessary. As long as you keep trying, chipping away at the bonds of resentment, hate and self-pity, you will make continued progess along the road of happy destiny.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

He got up and followed him

The Gospel reading from today’s Mass is from Luke. In this excerpt (Luke 5:27-28), we read about the call of Levi, the tax collector:

After this he went out and saw a tax collector named Levi sitting at the customs post. He said to him, “Follow me.” And leaving everything behind, he got up and followed him.

via USCCB.

So, just like that? Jesus wanders past, sees the guy, asks him to abandon his job to follow him? Much to ponder here on our readiness to “follow him.”

It isn’t that we would just leave our jobs; for perhaps 90+% of you that is just impractical, to just abandon your regular life and join a religious order or some lay apostolate and “follow him” that way.

But there are a myriad of other ways to show evidence of your being a follower of Jesus. The First Reading from today’s Mass as well as yesterday’s are from Isaiah, and selections within help form the Church’s teachings on the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. Be of service to others.

Other ways are to simply live as Jesus would have you. Spend extra time during Lent studying the Gospels; pray to the Holy Spirit to guide you and direct your reading accordingly.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)