Category Archives: Forgiveness

Return to me with your whole heart

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Today is Ash Wednesday, the beginning of Lent. The First Reading from today’s Mass is from the Prophecy of Joel:

Joel 2:12-18: “Even now, says the LORD,
return to me with your whole heart,
with fasting, and weeping, and mourning;
Rend your hearts, not your garments,
and return to the LORD, your God.
For gracious and merciful is he,
slow to anger, rich in kindness,
and relenting in punishment.
Perhaps he will again relent
and leave behind him a blessing,
Offerings and libations
for the LORD, your God.

Blow the trumpet in Zion!
proclaim a fast,
call an assembly;
Gather the people,
notify the congregation;
Assemble the elders,
gather the children
and the infants at the breast;
Let the bridegroom quit his room
and the bride her chamber.
Between the porch and the altar
let the priests, the ministers of the LORD, weep,
And say, ‘Spare, O LORD, your people,
and make not your heritage a reproach,
with the nations ruling over them!
Why should they say among the peoples,
‘Where is their God?”

Then the LORD was stirred to concern for his land
and took pity on his people.”

(Via USCCB.)

Lent is a time of repentance and of preparation for the Lord’s suffering, death and resurrection. These are the things that we are expected to believe in as Catholic Christians and apply to our own lives. We accept all suffering that comes into our lives a sign our willingness to “be like Christ” who suffered for us. We should die to the world and reject its transitory and false teachings and values. And if we do these things, we will at the end of the world be resurrected and live forever with God in Heaven.

Lent foreshadows this and is the time we spend in contemplative reflection, examining our consciences and ridding ourselves of faults and defects that separate us from God. It is one of my favorite times of the year as it was probably the first season of the Church’s liturgical year that I started to closely identify Church spirituality with the 12 Steps of AA. A number of AA’s Steps deal with “examination of conscience” and ridding oneself of “character defects.” Lent is a great time to apply this mix of Catholic spirituality and 12 Step practice.

So, starting today, “rend your hearts”, and “fast” from worldly attractions and “mourn and weep” over past separation from God that these attractions have caused. God is “gracious and merciful” and will take “pity on His people”, which is us, His adopted children.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes for Alcoholics: Day 9

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The intention of this novena was to focus attention on the healing aspects of Catholicism through a devotion to Mary, the Mother of God. Mary as Our Lady of Lourdes was chosen as she is an obvious recourse for Catholic addicts and alcoholics. She is our primary intercessor with the Trinity, and like any good Mom wants her children to do well.

But there is ongoing healing available within the Catholic Faith. Through the sacraments we have certain access to God’s graces. In the sacrament of Confession (also known as Penance or Reconciliation) our sins are forgiven and we grow in holiness if we have a “firm purpose of amendment.” In the Eucharist (Holy Communion) we receive Jesus. The Divine Healer Himself enters into us. How intimate is that? (And Protestants and Evangelicals claim that the Catholic Church doesn’t encourage a personal relationship with Jesus!)

Pray this novena at any time of the year, it doesn’t have to be in February. But also know that healing is there, all the time (if you are patient and humble and understand that things happen in His time and in accord with His will.)

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes for Alcoholics: Day 7

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Yesterday during the sixth day of this novena, I wrote about forgiveness. Today the subject is a related issue, that of resentment.

Resentment it is said, means “to feel again”. We alcoholics all understand this. When we resent something we are reliving the event all over, we nurture the emotion and maintain the grudge against the person who harmed us.

This is obviously harmful. It continues to keep open the wound inflicted upon our psyche and it hinders our spiritual progression. Our hearts are hardened and therefore we cannot hear the still, small voice of God speaking to us.

There is an AA slogan: “Let go and let God”. Basically it means to let go of whatever it is that has gotten you trapped and let God take care of it.

On the surface this would seem to be like shirking responsibility and “passing the buck”, except that it is God I am speaking about here and we are His children. Like any good parent, He seeks to heal us and protect us if we but ask Him. He will heal us of the pain in His time, meaning we end up learning something from the experience and grow closer to Him. If the pain was removed right away, my experience tells me that it will return and nothing was gained from the whole event.

As always, the Blessed Mother is there to help:

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

One More Day

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This was originally written on February 29, 2008, which was a Leap Day. It was posted to a soon-to-be-discontinued blog of mine and is being transferred to this one like most of the other posts on it. I had kept it as a draft in my blog editor, postdated to February 29, 2012, but have since gotten tired of seeing it at the top of the drafts list and don’t much feel like seeing it there for the next three years. And so I am posting it now, which is rather appropriate considering the theme of healing in the Our Lady of Lourdes Novena I am writing now.

(“Today is February 29th. A Leap Day. An extra day added to the calendar to make up for a lack some sort of astronomical timekeeping synchronization.

It’s nice to have an extra day. An extra day to make up for a lack of… not having done something you should have or would have done when you had the time?

Think about those people in your life that once they’re gone, all opportunities to love or make amends for wrongs would disappear. Death takes away opportunities.

Don’t wait for death to take away someone that you might wish for “one more day” to do something you could have when they were alive.”)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes for Alcoholics: Day 6

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We all bear grudges at one time or another. Someone has wronged us, either by a real infraction or a perceived one, and we are hurt. There is a wound on our psyche and we suffer. The hurt remains and we are tied to the person and the event by this feeling. This is maintained by being unforgiving.

Forgiveness cuts these ties. By forgiving the person of the wrong they have perpetrated against us we release ourselves from the anchor that hinders our spiritual development.

Some people, myself included, feel that withholding forgiveness denies victory to the perpetrator. We feel that we have the upper hand, the moral high ground in the conflict. Truth is, quite often the perpetrator doesn’t remember the action, doesn’t care about the event and may even be not guilty of any wrongdoing. The only person suffering is the victim. Not always, but even when the grudge is justified, holding onto it only perpetuates the original act. It is as if there just wasn’t one harmful act, but a succession.

We can heal ourselves by forgiving the person, either outright through contact with that person, or just in our own minds. We release ourselves from the event and the harm it had caused. The effects may not be immediate, but healing will occur over time.

There are additional posts on forgiveness on this blog, just go to the “Labels”section in the sidebar and click on “Forgiveness”.

The Blessed Mother is always ready to assist us:

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A general apology of sorts

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I feel the need to offer an apology for the lack of posting recently. My wife just told me that I apologize for “not blogging” too much. That’s possible. But perhaps my conscience is bothering me. Or maybe I’m just a melancholic moody alcoholic in recovery and those moods get the best of me. But, I have been very guilty over the past year or so of promising daily posting and coming up with various plans to get myself to do just that. I have not followed through by virtue of the fact that I have never posted daily apart from novenas or a special series on things.

A part of me says that I shouldn’t feel lousy about myself as I have been through a series of major life-changing events this past year, every one of which is usually at or near the top of lists that state: “Doing any one of these things runs the risks of relapse.” (Relocation, job-changing and marriage, all in one year!) But still, I was raised with the notion that if you say you’re going to do something, follow through and do it. The fact that I didn’t relapse and was never seriously tempted to do so is a testimony to my Faith and sobriety. Not a testimony to me, but to the tools at my disposal.

Nevertheless, my intentions have exceeded my ability to deliver. I suppose my eyeballs got too big at blogging possibilities and my grasp reached for too much and I should have toned down expectations and just delivered what I could when I was able.

At any rate, please take this apology as a sincere attempt to work through stuff and get back on a track of sorts. The situation announced in my “blog update-personal news” post is holding true. The office is getting organized.

Blogging, as I always state, will continue. Stopping is never an option.

Thanks for your patience.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Moving beyond your past

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There is an excellent article posted this morning (October 17, 2008) in Spirit Daily on resolving issues from the past such as hurts and resentments.

As alcoholics and addicts we know all too well how dangerous it is to spend too much time nursing grudges and harboring resentments. This article may kick start or remind people of the necessity of moving past the hurts and bad feelings of the past.

There’s more at stake than sobriety.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Seven Deadly Sins

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Penitent Jeff over at Conversion for Life | A Catholic Journey has started writing a series of posts on the Seven Deadly Sins.

Check him out.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The sins of my youth

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In the Liturgy of the Hours reading for Daytime Prayer (Midday) there is a line from Sacred Scripture that stood out:

Psalm 25:7: “Remember no more the sins of my youth; remember me only in light of your love.“

(Via USCCB.)

Our alcoholic and addictive past is full of wreckage, mostly sinful. The weight of that past drags us down unless we clean it up by turning to God. The Sacrament of Reconciliation (aka “Confession” or “Penance”) is there for our use. It cleanses us of our sins and washes clean our past before God. It is a Sacrament of Love in that our Father in Heaven takes us back and welcomes us to Him because we repented of our sins and turned to Him for forgiveness.

In the “Big Book” of AA (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed, Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. New York, 2001) there is a line on page 83,

“We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.”

This is part of the 10th Step Promises, which detail a list of positive changes in attitude if one has persevered in working the first Nine Steps. I won’t go into all that now. But our regret of the past is rooted in the stain of sin on our souls, our wish to “not shut the door on it” is rooted in humility. If we do not remember our past, we will make the same mistakes again. Our remembering the past tempers any judgmental attitude towards others and helps us to use compassion in our dealings with people. Quite often they are as messed up as we are.

Psalm 51:3-5: “Have mercy on me, God, in your goodness; in your abundant compassion blot out my offense.

Wash away all my guilt; from my sin cleanse me.

For I know my offense; my sin is always before me.”

(Via USCCB.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The many ways of God's healing gifts

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The following is a link to an article on being open to the varied and diverse ways that God can heal you. Please read and consider how or if it can be relevant to your life.

Spirit Daily – Daily spiritual news from around the world: “GOD IS A GOD OF SURPRISE AND HAS SUCH IN STORE FOR YOU IF YOU HEAL INSIDE AND LOVE”

(Via Spirit Daily.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)