Confession and examen

Lent is obviously a popular time for going to Confession. What with all the penitential acts going on, NOT going would be odd. Most parishes have penance services where the sacrament is offered at a time when it usually isn’t, to enable and encourage people to go.

There are two great examination of consciences you can use. The first one is from the Vatican’s website; it is a link to the Ten Commandments. I suggest that you read over them all and assess how you stack up. If you have your own copy, they begin at paragraph 2052.

This is a direct link to a downloadable PDF file which contains a nice examination of conscience: Downloadable Confession Guide (PDF)

There is another great opportunity for confession right after Easter; Divine Mercy Sunday is the Second Sunday of Easter. (See the link in the previous sentence for information on celebrating it.) There is a plenary indulgence attached to going to Confession and celebrating the Divine Mercy devotions on that day. See also: Divine Mercy Sunday.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Lenten blogging check-in

Quickie Lenten blogging check-in: I’ve been busy with a lot of reading recently. I have at long last finished reading the Catechism of the Catholic Church. By this I mean having a completed a run-through from start to finish; prior to this I’ve read sections of it when I needed to know something. I don’t know how much of it I had read in that manner, but I wanted to make sure that the entire volume had been ingested by me and thus the reading from beginning to end. If you haven’t done this, I urge you to. Even if it is just as a daily devotional: the CCC is an awesome book, we all need a daily dose of Truth and it has it, along with your Catholic Bible.

I feel like an item has been checked off my “bucket list.”

I’ve also been getting continuing with reading some of St. Maximilian Kolbe’s writings; partly because it’s a long-term reading project I had set aside and I missed them, and I have to look up stuff to help a buddy get over a “stumbling block” about some of St. Max’s teachings.

Speaking of reading: I have also finally finished the complete, unabridged version of “The Mystical City of God,” by Ven. Mary of Jesus of Agreda. It is a 2,700 page (+/- ~100ish pages) history or biography of the Blessed Virgin Mary. It’s epic. I may blog about it sometime.

Anyway, I just wanted to post this as a sort of “check-in;” I pray daily about blogging and since Sunday I’ve been told to read 😉 I do have a number of posts in draft form and hope to push a few of them out over the next week, including reviews of two books on spiritual growth and development that I really think you all should get…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

490 times!

In this excerpt of the Gospel from the Mass for Tuesday of the Third Week of Lent (Matthew 18:21-22) we learn the importance Jesus places upon forgiveness:

Then Peter, drawing near to him, said: “Lord, how many times shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Even seven times?”

Jesus said to him: “I do not say to you, even seven times, but even seventy times seven times.”

Courtesy: Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

If you pair this off with the petition near the end of the “Lord’s Prayer,” that part that goes: “…and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us,” and we have a real major issues if we hold on to grievances and resentments.

Getting rid of them is indeed hard. I’ve got some that are persistent and at times I think I’m over them. But a wandering mind at times seeks something to grab onto and it gravitates towards and old hurt. And them doesn’t let go.

I like to think that I’ve forgiven the original offense, and that it’s just the emotional pain that persists in memory, but I’m not sure. I’ve read countless things on forgiveness; that it doesn’t mean forgetting or reconciliation, it just means that you’ve disconnected from the original event and no longer expect or want an apology or explanation. It no longer has that hold on you. The hurt happened, it’s way back there in the past and let it go. The pain may return from time to time, but that’s just being human. If you quickly run some spiritual techniques to quell the memory, perhaps you can move on again.

I suppose it’s time to dwell on forgiveness, for if we cannot forgive, we cannot expect it ourselves.

(I just checked, this post is the 100th post in the Forgiveness Category and 67th in the Resentment one! Maybe I should spend some time reading these…)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The wounded prodigal

Today’s Gospel Reading for the Saturday of the Second Week of Lent is a popular one involving mercy and forgiveness. It is the story of “The Prodigal Son.”

I wrote about it before: Prodigal Alcoholics.

In that post I focused on mercy and forgiveness. There is also another point: the longing to belong and rejoin what you once had, even if in a more humble state. The Prodigal was intent on just being a hired hand for his father; he never expected to be readmitted to the family. Perhaps this is what we all hope for in our recovery: that our families and employers would just “forget” our sins and problems and move forward in life with us, just happy that we’re back and healthy. This does not always happen. Perhaps for some, and even then probably over time. We all mess up and wish for a “do over,” like nothing ever happened. This is not realistic, as our addiction did happen. Since God has this knack for bringing good out of evil, we can use this to our advantage. Use the experience of our addiction and recovery and help others in some way. Perhaps not by starting a blog about recovery process 😉 but at least by using the humbling experience of our own suffering to be understanding of others’ suffering and “screwed-upness.” We who were screwed up can have empathy towards others. We should be better able to connect and understand other people’s brokenness and wounded nature.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A brief note about this Lent’s blogging

I do not intend to blog daily during this Lent, although I have almost done that. What I am doing is looking at the Daily Mass readings and seeing if anything strikes me as useful for a blog post, as I have often found inspiration from them in the past. If I have blogged about a reading before, and if that post seems useful enough to bring to your attention again, I’ll refer you to that earlier post. Otherwise I’ll just “pass.” Perhaps you can read the Daily Mass Readings yourself and glean something from them. Obviously, from time to time I’ll have posts not connected to the Mass readings.

I do hope to continue the pace established by all this; remember I consecrated this blog to the Blessed Virgin Mary, and since Mom’s my new boss, I do have a responsibility to live up to my intentions. I’m hoping for several posts a week after Lent (as opposed to the past frequency of a few a month.) That is, if Mom approves. 🙂

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Who do you trust?

In the First Reading from the Mass for Thursday of the Second Week of Lent, (Jeremiah 17:5-10) we learn what happens when we withdraw our trust frpm God and give it to humans:

“Thus says the Lord: “Cursed is a man who trusts in man, and who establishes what is flesh as his right arm, and whose heart withdraws from the Lord.

For he will be like a saltcedar tree in the desert. And he will not perceive it, when what is good has arrived. Instead, he will live in dryness, in a desert, in a land of salt, which is uninhabitable.

Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, for the Lord will be his confidence.

And he will be like a tree planted beside waters, which sends out its roots to moist soil. And it will not fear when the heat arrives. And its leaves will be green. And in the time of drought, it will not be anxious, nor will it cease at any time to bear fruit.

The heart is depraved above all things, and it is unsearchable, who can know it?

I am the Lord, who examines the heart and tests the temperament, who gives to each one according to his way and according to the fruit of his own decisions.

Courtesy: Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

The last line can be either very reassuring or scary, depending on the amount of spiritual progress you’ve made in your relationship with God. Like all relationships, things are less scary (if at all) if you’ve gotten to a level of closeness. You tend to trust those close to you more than those you barely know. (Wow, that’s a great insight. Stick around, I got more!) This reminds of a classic ‘fear’ I read long ago in AA literature about being afraid to follow God’s will; “What if he wants me to be a missionary in Africa?” Well, that wouldn’t be a fear if you have a long-standing relationship with the Lord. You’ve learned how He provides for you and doesn’t give you tasks beyond your abilities.

Lent is the perfect time of year to grow your relationship with Jesus. Study the Passion narratives in the Gospels. Try doing the Stations of the Cross in a parish (or even on your own if possible. That way you can dwell on each station in your own time.) Discover how much Jesus loves you…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Adoration

I just returned from my Holy Hour earlier this evening. This is an invitation to all of you who are able to do so to consider spending time with the Lord in Adoration. Jesus is truly Present: Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity in the Eucharist. If the Catholic parishes near you do not have Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament exposed sometime during the week or even 24/7, perhaps try to attend Mass earlier than usual and adore Him while He’s reposed in the tabernacle.

There is nothing on Earth like being in the Presence of the Lord. That’s HIM there, no symbol. HIM.

If during Lent we are supposed to grow closer to Jesus, actually spending more time with Him during Adoration is one fine way…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

How devoted you are

The First Reading from today’s Mass for the Second Sunday of Lent is the well-known one concerning Abraham being asked by God to offer up his first born son Isaac as a sacrifice, only to be prevented from doing so by an angel of the Lord. It as a test of Abraham’s faith.

In the homily at the Mass I attended this weekend the priest mentioned that Abraham was asked to give up the one thing he most loved in the world. Abraham and his wife Sarah were barren and didn’t have Isaac until very late in life, not until the Lord intervened miraculously. So being asked by God to sacrifice the one thing you desired most in the world was a serious test of fidelity to God.

The thought occurred to me while I sat in the pew; “This would make a good Sober Catholic post.”

And so here it is.

Question: what would you do if God asked you? If the Lord God Almighty asked you to give up something really important to you? Since this is for the most part a blog on Catholic spirituality regarding addiction recovery (or at least my perspective on it), think along those terms. Especially if that something is a character defect or some other thing blocking your sobriety or recovery. (The question is rhetorical, you needn’t post your answer in the comments. Just think about it.)

I am reminded of a person who had engaged in email correspondence with me a few years ago; his wife left him over his drinking, took their daughter with her. All he had to do was go to a treatment center to get them back. He refused. He felt he could stop drinking on his own, despite zero evidence of his ability to do that. Pride got in his way; he rejected the humiliation of checking into treatment. And so his family suffered. The correspondence ended about then; one thing I wanted to tell him was “Men do what they need to do, boys do what they want to do.”

He was being asked to give up his pride and drinking for his family; he didn’t want to. I have no idea what their situation is today, perhaps he hit bottom and dragged his arse into treatment. Or perhaps he wound up in Divorce Court.

This situation isn’t unique; the scenario is probably one of the more common ones, that of one spouse or family member preferring the bottle to the family.

Nevertheless… that one thing he had to do…

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Love your enemies

In this excerpt from the Gospel for the Mass of Saturday of the First Week of Lent (Matthew 5:44) Jesus exhorts us to: “Love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you. And pray for those who persecute and slander you.”

Courtesy: Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

Not easy for anyone, especially those of us who are in recovery and have a past littered with problematic relationships.

Jesus is asking us to make amends. Matthew 5 has a number of passages on this; just earlier in this chapter Jesus is warning us to make amends to our ‘brother’ before offering a sacrifice if there is anything between you both.

It is not easy, at all, to “love” those who took issue with our drinking, especially if we gave them reason to hate us for our behavior. Given all of this, it is difficult to come around in our recovery to try and approach them with love. But we try. We love them in our hearts, we do our best to do good to and for them. We pray for them.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Deeds, Words, Prayer

In “Divine Mercy in My Soul,” the spiritual diary of St. Faustina Kowalska (for info read this: St. Faustina and Divine Mercy) Jesus communicates to St. Faustina something important about mercy:

“I am giving you three ways of exercising mercy toward your neighbor: the first – by deed, the second – by word, the third – by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for me. By this means a soul glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy.” (Diary paragraph 742)

This is a possible Lenten practice. Obviously, not just for Lent, but keep in mind that the best Lents are those that transform us into Jesus and thus what we become at the end of the season we should try and maintain afterwards. And thus, practicing these “three ways of mercy” during Lent will assist you in venerating His mercy and helping you become more merciful.

Given these increasingly trying times, mercy is certainly needed more than ever. Consider what Jesus told St. Faustina: “Mankind will not have peace until it turns with trust to My Mercy.” (Diary paragraph 300)

So, the first way is “deeds of mercy.” There are the 14 Works of Mercy identified by the Church:

Corporal Works of Mercy

Feed the hungry
Give drink to the thirsty
Shelter the Homeless
Clothe the naked
Visit the Sick
Visit the imprisoned
Bury the dead

Spiritual Works of Mercy

Correct the sinner
Instruct the ignorant
Counsel the doubting
Comfort the sorrowful
Be patient with those in error
Forgive offenses
Pray for the living and the dead

There is also this, from St. Faustina’s Diary, paragraph 163:

“O Lord. I want to be completely transformed into Your mercy and to be Your living reflection. May the greatest of all divine attributes, that of Your unfathomable mercy, pass through my heart and soul to my neighbor.

Help me, O Lord, that my eyes may be merciful, so that I may never suspect or judge from appearances, but look for what is beautiful in my neighbors’ souls and come to their rescue.

Help me, O Lord, that my ears may be merciful, so that I may give heed to my neighbors’ needs and not be indifferent to their pains and moanings.

Help me, O Lord, that my tongue may be merciful, so that I should never speak negatively of my neighbor, but have a word of comfort and forgiveness for all.

Help me, O Lord, that my hands may be merciful and filled with good deeds, so that I may do only good to my neighbors and take upon myself the more difficult and toilsome tasks.

Help me, O Lord, that my feet may be merciful, so that I may hurry to assist my neighbor, overcoming my own fatigue and weariness

Help me, O Lord, that my heart may be merciful so that I myself may feel all the sufferings of my neighbor.”

Study that prayer and see how you can apply it everyday. I try. It’s not easy.

The second way is “words of mercy.” Be mindful of your speech. Be kind in your discourse with other people. Stop gossiping. Let rumors die with you. Stop being harsh; especially on the Internet, whether in Facebook debates and Twitter wars, knock off the crap. It’s not as if you’re going to actually change someone’s mind, anyway. At least not if you’re using vitriol.

Lastly, “prayers of mercy.” Pray for others. Start praying DAILY the Divine Mercy Chaplet.

Get going!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)