Category Archives: Me

Our Lady of the Rosary: year in review reflection

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Today was the Feast of Our Lady of the Rosary. That link is a post I wrote last year.

It has been quite a year for me since that post. In that year I relocated to a new city to be closer to my then-girlfriend (after commuting weekly 360 miles/580 km round-trip for nearly 2 months), took a low-paying part-time job just to be near her, got a new job a few months later – just before the actual wedding, and endured a lot of change and trials on that job these past 8 months on it. I proposed to her 10 months ago today on the Vigil of the Feast of the Immaculate Conception (Rose said “Yes” but made me propose again the next day as she felt it was more proper to do so on the day of the feast instead. Women… (!!!). ) All in all, a new life, and a year that most people would have taken several years to live out. No boasting, just a lot of life development and such all packed in to one year, that others would have experienced over a longer period.

A strong faith and strong sobriety was key in my surviving this past year. There was much that could have undermined my sobriety, ask any long-term member of a 12 Step group and they would have said something about too much change too soon. Change, or big change and a lot of it, isn’t good for any recovered/recovering alcoholic. Having something worthwhile to achieve (like a great lady) helps.

From Romans 12:12: “Rejoice in hope, endure in affliction, persevere in prayer.”

(Via USCCB.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

blog update

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Just a short note to anyone wondering, but this blog is still alive despite no postings for nearly 3 weeks. Posting shall hopefully resume this week. Life, work and stuff got in the way. Things are OK, just haven’t been getting around to posting!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Young man, I tell you, arise

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The Gospel Reading for today’s Mass (Wednesday of the 24th Week in Ordinary Time) has been special for me these past few years.

Luke 7:11-17: “Jesus journeyed to a city called Nain, and his disciples and a large crowd accompanied him.

As he drew near to the gate of the city, a man who had died was being carried out, the only son of his mother, and she was a widow.

A large crowd from the city was with her. When the Lord saw her, he was moved with pity for her and said to her,‘Do not weep.’

He stepped forward and touched the coffin; at this the bearers halted, and he said, ‘Young man, I tell you, arise!’

The dead man sat up and began to speak, and Jesus gave him to his mother.

Fear seized them all, and they glorified God, exclaiming, ‘A great prophet has arisen in our midst,’ and ‘God has visited his people.’

This report about him spread through the whole of Judea and in all the surrounding region. “

(Via USCCB.)

I was not the only son of my mother, but I was her youngest and I had lived with her for her last 10 years on Earth. For her last 18 months I was her caregiver of sorts.

I discovered sobriety just in time to be useful to her in her final years. The thought of my still being addicted to the bottle at any time during her last couple of years scares me to this day, I am very grateful to God that He pulled me away from the bottle in plenty of time for Mom to see me sober and responsible enough to care for her. This is why I have a special connection to this Gospel passage. I was dead, but with God’s graces through AA and then the Catholic Church I arose from the death of alcoholism and I became sober and a strong Catholic.

Today I was reflecting on her death and the hellish period that followed for me. I remember walking around the streets of my hometown on the day she died muttering and mumbling to myself about how alone I was. This was in between tears. I was convinced that I was alone and that I would forever be alone. I do not believe that I had ever felt this way, this mind-numbing, marrow-curdling feelings of aloneness and abandonment.

I wanted to die. I wasn’t suicidal, but I had prayed to God that He would take me as I was convinced that my mission on Earth was over. I was born late in Mom’s life (just after her 47th birthday) and things seemed geared for me to be useful to Mom at various points in her life, especially after Dad died in 1995 and as I stated above, just before her own death in 2005. I hadn’t amounted to much of anything through 2005, at least by most people’s standards.

I am glad that God didn’t agree with me. I am glad because I have discovered relative security and deep love in my life. My faith in God’s Divine Providence and reliance on His Catholic Church pulled me through and gave me a new meaning in a life that I wouldn’t have scripted, but am happy with nonetheless. I am still puzzled by many things, but life isn’t really a problem to be solved, but a mystery to unravel.

I had arisen, like the young man of Nain.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Crossing the Goal

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Note: cross-posted from Trudging Paulcoholic’s Road .

I just watched the encore broadcast of “Crossing the Goal”, a new EWTN program on Christian living and spirituality for men (Although probably women can benefit from it, especially if they have a man in their lives that they love and care about).

I make mention of it here as a recovered alcoholic I found many aspects of my life not fully developed and ripe for improvement, not the least of which was how to live as a man. In my spiritual progression out from alcoholism, I discovered that to be fully recovered (or on the path to being that) I had to rediscover what it means to be a man, not by today’s sexually overcharged, confused or ambiguous standards, but how to live as a virtuous and sober Catholic Christian man. It was the only way I felt that I could keep the drink at bay. There have been various aids along the way, one of which is the book entitled Spiritual Workout of a Former Saint (Via Our Sunday Visitor.) by former NFL All-Pro and New Orleans Saints coach Danny Abramowicz. Coach Abramowicz is a co-host of the show, and one reason why I tuned into it.

Today’s episode was on “Courage” and I won’t do the program justice by going into what they discussed, but it set the tone for the series as a weekly guide on how to find your true calling in life and live up to your potential. It also seems to serve as an antidote to the idea that religion and spirituality is the territory of women (how many men are there at Mass as opposed to women, at least in Western countries? Same for parish organizations? Not complaining nor judging female involvement in the Church, but it does seem that men have ceded activity in the Church to women. For the Church to be healthy, men need to take a greater, cooperative role.)

The website of the show is Crossing the Goal , and it contains the show’s airdates. It is repeated several times during the week. I highly recommend that you watch. (I don’t have cable nor satellite TV, I was able to watch it on my Mac using QuickTime.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Super Commenter Award!

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Yours truly, Paulcoholic, has received a blogging award! I am trying to be humble as this has never happened before, which isn’t too shocking as seeing that Sober Catholic is a niche blog that doesn’t fit too well into many of the categories that the big annual blogging awards have. And in the things that I’m told I’m good at, like writing, I’m easily outdone by the usual winners, so it’s all good.

Awards are all politics, anyway. LOL LOL LOL!!!

Anyway, the award is this:

super_commentator.jpg

Adrienne over at Adrienne’s Catholic Corner bestowed this award upon me, for which I am truly grateful.

I now have to award this to other bloggers. It was supposed to be 7, but Adrienne amended the rules. Praise her!

So, this goes to the other Catholic recovery (or related) bloggers known to me, plus 2 special ones. They now have to pass it on to other bloggers. “Paulcoholic’s Codicil to Adrienne’s Amendment of the Super-Commenter Award Rules” states that you needn’t pass it along right away. No time limit, this isn’t a seasonal award.

In no particular order:

Ken J over at We Are Not Saints…YET! is also a valued member of Catholics in Recovery .

Scott at Sober Nuggets , where he provides: ..simply a space for recovering alcoholics and addicts to share the joys, struggles and realities of a sober life. .

Fallen Sparrow over at, well, Fallen Sparrow . He just discovered me last week, and I was as pleased as he was to discover another Catholic blogger that writes about alcoholism and recovery.

Penitent Jeff over at Conversion for Life | A Catholic Journey. While not a blog focusing on recovery, he does write about issues and topics that are of great relevance to anyone in sobriety, or for that matter, anyone who wishes to grow in their Catholic Faith.

Jackie over at catholicmomof10revisited . She is a good read. Prolific, too! (And I’m not referring to her 10 kids!!!)

Terry of Abbey-Roads and Abbey-Roads2 . Not a recovery blogger, but a fine Catholic blogger. Were it not for my marital vocation, his might have been an interesting path to consider. (Monastic life, committed celibacy and art and writing.) He links to me, and admired my series on St. Benedict’s Ladder of Humility .

Now, for the special ones. Awards can be bribery, at least I say they can. For these two, it’s to get them to blog more:

Beniamino Il Cacciatore Umile better known to me and 4marks friends as “Colorado Ben” or, the “Mountain Monk”. If his blog gets to be as spiritual and profound as his posts in the 4marks fora were (especially in “The Cave”), then he’d be a grand member in the Catholic blogosphere. C’mon, dude, blog!!! Oh, yeah, he blogs at: Leidolfr, the Lead Wolf .

And last, and most definitely not least, this award goes to Rose, my lovely wife.

She blogs at God’s Merciful Love, a blog about the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. It also showcases her photography, namely artistic impressions of Catholic themes. God’s Merciful Love is a companion site to God’s Merciful Love social network . (Rose is contemplating a name change for her blog.) The social network is a site we established to help get Catholics together to discuss the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. We promise “Faith-filled Fellowship & Fun!”

This was fun. My first intentionally silly post.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Blog activity (repost)

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Sorry I haven’t posted in over 2 weeks. I have been putting in a lot of overtime (voluntary and mandatory) at work, and what with sleeping and entertaining some out-of-town guests blogging had taken a hit.

At least I have been able to spend some time on Catholics in Recovery . That was actually a help.

“Regular” blogging should resume.

Thanks!

BLOGGER’S NOTE: I had to correct the URL for Catholics in Recovery and repost this from August 6th. It mistakenly had “blogspot” and not “ning” in the HTML.

With that said, blog activity should pick up from now on, I am developing a sustained interest in regular posting. Of course, I said that before 🙂

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

God's Merciful Love

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I am posting about another blogging project that I am involved with. The new blog is God’s Merciful Love and it was started by my wife, Rose S., yesterday.

As the title suggests, it is about God’s love and mercy. Specifically, it is on the Corporal and Spiritual Works of Mercy. They are:

The Spiritual Works of Mercy

Correct the sinner.
Instruct the ignorant.
Counsel the doubting.
Comfort the sorrowful.
Be patient with those in error.
Forgive offenses.
Pray for the living and the dead.

The Corporal Works of Mercy

Feed the hungry.
Give drink to the thirsty.
Shelter the homeless.
Clothe the naked.
Visit the sick.
Visit the imprisoned.
Bury the dead.

The blog is Rose’s baby, but I will be a contributor. “God’s Merciful Love” will hope to instruct and involve people in the various works of mercy, either online or wherever they are. There may be “Events” or “Meetups” in various parts of the world where people can engage in these works.

For those readers who feel that we are saved only by professing a belief in Jesus Christ and that works are “bribing God”, this is utter nonsense and unsupported by Scripture. We as Christians are called to respond to the Gospel and build the Kingdom of God on Earth, we will not do that by just saying “Jesus, Jesus.” Faith and works go hand-in-hand, by faith we profess in Jesus and by works we demonstrate that Faith. Works do not get us into Heaven, we can never earn or merit our way in. But by our works we prove our faith in Jesus.

Email me or go visit the blog and support my wife’s endeavor!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Trudging Paulcoholic's Road

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I’ve added a new blog to my repertoire, a new endeavor by myself to explore a more personal path of my sober journey. While Sober Catholic is about how to use the Catholic Faith and spirituality to maintain you sobriety, Trudging Paulcoholic’s Road will be of a more personal nature. Based on the focus and development of Sober Catholic, I was uncomfortable with exploring how my conversion and sobriety affected me. The blog was about Catholicism, not me. “Trudging Paulcoholic’s Road” will be the other way around, it will be about my relationship with the Faith and how I use it in reacting to things in a sober way.

The first post is up.

I hope you enjoy it. It shouldn’t affect my writing for this blog.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Sober anniversary

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At about this time six years ago (May 22, 2002, not sure exactly the hour) I had my last drink.

It was vodka, cheap and seemingly necessary. I had relapsed a week or two before after only 3 1/2 months of sobriety, and had embarrassed myself at an AA meeting the day before. At most AA meetings someone reads a selection from the “How It Works” chapter of AA’s basic text “Alcoholic Anonymous”. I slurred my words and it was quite clear I was under the influence. That day’s topic was me and relapsing.

The next day I went back to that AA meeting and it was a newcomer’s meeting. I felt like a hypocrite telling 2 new people how the 12 Steps helped me so I walked out and stopped off at a liquor store before going home. I finished the bottle that night.

What followed were 88 hours of insomnia and hallucinations. I wrote about it last year in a post here . The changes in my life since that post have been astonishing. I met a lady, moved to be near her, married her and found a rewarding job.

I guess “hope” is the operative word here. There is hope if you stick it out.

No matter how good or how bad, drinking is never an option.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A hopefully brief hiatus (or, Still Here, Part 2)

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A few weeks ago I wrote this post about little posting activity.

This is to announce that Sober Catholic is gong on a brief hiatus, only until after my wedding this March 29th and after our internet service is switched over to a new provider. I may blog a little from my fiancee’s (or wife’s!) computer, but will probably be too busy setting up house and completing my move. In addition, I may be signed up for some additional training for my new job, that may begin next week, a few weeks earlier than originally planned by the company. I will have to study for this.

The stress has actually eased up.

I shall see you all again by Mid-April. Keep meditating on the Daily Mass readings!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)