Category Archives: Me

Why I stopped regularly attending AA meetings

Posted on by

I wrote in my last post, “Today is my Twentieth Soberversary” that I had last attended an AA meeting as a regular member in 2004, and that I left it in anger. I thought that I had posted about it before, but couldn’t find it. If it exists, then finding it is taking more time than writing a new one about the experience. So, I’m writing a new one. Or the first one. Shut up and blog, Paulcoholic.

OK, so it was August 2004. I was ‘going through some stuff’ that summer and one of the ways I got through it all was to be the coffeemaker for my Home Group. Usually, the job rotates. My Home Group met every weekday and I ‘needed’ to make it everyday to cope. No one objected as they knew I needed it and wouldn’t keep it as a daily service work forever. So for a few months, I made the coffee every day. And then around August I decided that I had gotten past the worst of what I was going through and was now ready to relinquish the job, keeping just Monday for myself. This other guy had taken Tuesday.

All was fine for a while. Then one day, a Monday, actually, the meeting began and the Tuesday Guy was the chairperson. My Home Group had some liberal policies as to who can chair a meeting. Tuesday Guy had only three months in the program, but he wanted to chair it and no one objected. When it came time to come up with a topic, no one suggested any and so he came up with one. It was a topic that oftentimes is introduced during the holidays. “What to do when confronted with a drinking situation.” (Because around Christmas, Easter and other holidays, a recovering person often finds themselves in just such a situation.) Tuesday Guy, if I recall correctly, recently lost a friend in a motorcycle accident, and there was going to be an event held in the deceased’s honor at a local drinking establishment; ‘and should I go?”

I dislike sharing when I have no personal “experience, strength and hope” to relate to. In other words, if the topic is something I have no personal experience with, I’ll pass when called upon to share. I’d never really faced this situation, so I’ll just pass. 

Tuesday Guy started calling upon people to share. Then it was my turn. I said, “I’ll pass.” But Tuesday guy would have none of that. “No, Paul, we all want to know what you think about this!” 

Well, I always had this paranoid fear in AA meetings that one day I’ll be called upon to share, I’d refuse, and promptly be told that isn’t the custom at this meeting; ‘here, when you’re called to share, you must.’ A paranoid, irrational fear, to be true; and that it would only happen if I attended a meeting far beyond my home area, where they might have strange customs. Except that it didn’t happen in some far away AA meeting, it happened right in my Home Group! So, I figured I’ll just share what I know from AA’s ‘Conference-approved literature,’ in this case, something from their book, “Living Sober.” And so I quoted from memory a line that said something about ‘if you have a legitimate reason for being there,’ and at that point Tuesday Guy interrupted me. “Well, Paul doesn’t know what he’s talking about; can someone else share?”

I was stunned. My worst fear was not only realized, that of being forced to share, but while sharing relevant book knowledge, I was humiliated in from of a bunch of people. The meeting continued. The men couldn’t look at me; the women gave me sympathetic looks. Almost everyone quoted the same line I started quoting. 

The meeting ended. I don’t even recall if I helped clean up. As coffeemaker, my job was done prior to the meeting; afterwards others pitch in with the clean up. 

Remember, this was Monday and Tuesday follows, meaning Tuesday Guy was going to be there early the next day to open up and make the coffee. I was prepared.

Tuesday rolls around and I get there early. I timed my arrival so that I showed up after about when I thought Tuesday Guy got there but before anyone else arrived. I was successful. The site was opened, he was there, in the back, alone, getting ready. I stalked over to him, he sees me coming and has a crooked smirk. I went up to him and slammed down on the table, right next to the coffee machine, my copy of the building’s keys. I said quite loudly, almost shouting into his smirky face, “I AM NOT COMING TO THIS MEETING EVER AGAIN!”

And then I stormed out. All I can say is that when I was walking to my car I had a feeling of liberation. The sun was sunnier. The birds were chirpier. The cars driving by were carrier. And a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I literally felt lighter.

And I never set foot in that meeting. Well, not quite true. I did return a over a year later to an occasional meeting, but it had moved to a different location by then and so I figured my declaration held. 

Since that day in August 2004, I never considered myself a regular meeting attendee. As I’ve said before, I am a misfit in a fellowship of misfits. I don’t bother with live meetings; occasionally dabble in online recovery and read AA literature. But having a Home Group? Nope. 

A couple of posts on Catholics attending AA meetings:

Should Catholics Attend AA meetings? I heard they’re bad.

A Fortnight of Years in Sobriety

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Today is my Twentieth Soberversary

Posted on by

I have been sober today for twenty years. To me, anniversaries ending in “0” or “5” are monumental. I don’t know why, it just seems that way.

I had to let that sink in. Twenty years. While I am not trying to act out the sin of pride, if you knew me way back when around 2001 and 2002, you’d laugh at the idea of me getting twenty days sober, much less twenty years.

I never had that ‘spiritual awakening’ described in the Big Book of AA; no ‘white light’ or anything like that. My spiritual awakening was of the more gradual kind. I stopped going to liquor stores because I was physically unable to go (which caused a brief period of sobriety of 3 1/2 months); then I returned to drinking over the stress of visits of certain family members; then I stopped because I ran out of booze and it was too late to get to a liquor store. I think during the day I was prevented from going by the family visit and a miscalculation of the amount of booze I had on hand. I don’t recall. So, at some point late in the evening of Wednesday, May 22, 2002 I stopped drinking and went to bed. This was followed by 88 hours of insomnia culminating in some trippy hallucinations. 

I’ve done AA. I began attending meetings in June 2001; didn’t sober up at first until February 2002, but like I said above, relapsed in May. I haven’t considered myself a regular meeting goer since 2004, when I left a meeting in my old Home Group in anger. (I may have blogged about it before, but according to a search of my blog, I apparently didn’t. I’ tell that story in a separate blogpost.) I briefly returned to regular attendance in 2014, but it only last a month or two. I didn’t fit in. I guess I’m just a misfit in a fellowship of misfits. I find AA and the Twelve Steps useful, whilst I don’t bother with meetings, I frequently read the literature when I need a dose. 

Anyway, today is the Feast Day of St. Rita of Cascia. She is known as the patron saint of impossible cases. And, I was quite an impossible case. It’s possible I imagined it, but I think she picked me to be her client. And here’s how she can help YOU in your recovery. As long as I’m posting links to posts on her, you might like this one.

Two other saints assisted in my recovery. One is St. Maximilian Kolbe, founder of the Militia of the Immaculata. I found the his Total Consecration to the Blessed Virgin to have been particularly crucial as it provided a tremendous flow of daily graces firming up my convictions and direction (staying sober); as well as of providing a framework within which I can develop my Faith. (NOTE TO SELF: please complete the ‘Daily Marching Orders from Mary’ post. It’s been in draft mode long enough.) Another is the Venerable Matt Talbot, whose way of recovery focuses on transferring your love of booze on to Jesus. You make a gift to Him of your addiction and a relapse means you are taking that gift back. His Way of Recovery is detailed in this excellent book, which all “Sober Catholics” should  have. (There are other saints I am devoted to. St. Therese of Lisieux is another. That book I linked to in the previous sentence suggests that she is ‘the theologian’ of the Matt Talbot Way of Sobriety. Study her “Little Way” and things won’t be the same for you; particularly her thoughts on God’s mercy vs His judgment.).) 

I think I’ll go write that post about why my last regular AA meeting was in 2004 (I don’t count my return in 2014 as it didn’t last long.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

NOTE TO SELF: Novenas coming up

Posted on by

Today is the Feast of St. Joseph the Worker. It is in honor of his role within the Holy Family as the provider and breadwinner; inasmuch as he had never said anything recorded in Scripture, there’s the added concept of his humility and quiet service in supporting his loved ones. The Feast was established to combat the Communist unholy May Day celebrations of violent class struggle and atheistic propaganda.

I am posting this to remind myself that there are a lot of Novenas that I say in May, and I had forgotten to say one in honor of St. Joseph the Worker. So, don’t read this post since it’s for me 😉

First up is the Novena to Our Lady of Fatima. Beginning May 4th and ending May 12th, it honors the Marian Apparitions in Fatima, Portugal in 1917. On the Feast Day of Our Lady of Fatima, May 13th begins the Novena to St. Rita of Cascia. (Oh, by the way, on that day in 2019 I joined the Militia of the Immaculata’s affiliated association, the Knights at the Foot of the Cross – those who are members are M.I.’s who particularly offer up their suffering to win the world for the Sacred Heart of Jesus through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, as well as to strengthen the M.I.’s mission in that regard. I did not need to remind myself of that, but since you’re ignoring my request to not read this post, I figure I’ll tell you something.) The Feast of St. Rita, who is of great importance to me, falls of May 22nd. That is also my sobriety day; I’ll be 20 years sober then! I love St. Rita because I think she picked me as a client of hers, given the coincidence of her feast day with my sobriety day. Also, I was a tough ex-drunk, definitely not a poster child for early sobriety. Since she is the patroness of “Hopeless Cases,” I think that’s why she picked me. God gave me sufficient reason, or rather graces, to finally stop drinking on May 22, 2002. And St. Rita was put in charge! Thanks St. Rita. (NOTE TO SELF: write more about her, especially during the Novena.) OK, on the feast day of St. Rita begins a novena to St. Joan of Arc. Her feast day is May 30th. I do not have as yet a great devotion St. Joan, but another saintly friend of mine, St. Therese of Lisieux, did. So, to honor that friendship, I started saying a St. Joan Novena a few years ago. (I forgot last year, hence another reason for this post.)

So, from the 4th to the 12, the Fatima novena…. From the13th to the 21st,  the novena to St. Rita of Cascia….. And from the 22nd to the 30th, the novena to St. Joan of Arc. (Novenas typically end on the day before the feast day, but not always. Of you’re a big devotee of St. Joan, you’d probably begin on May 21st. I’ll be a day late but that’s OK.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Blog History and a new job!

Posted on by

It has come to my attention that I last posted here about six weeks ago. This means history has been made here at Sober Catholic! December 2021 was the very first month without any blogposts. I was going to say “That’s nothing to be proud of!” but when you consider I’ve been doing this since January 2007, that is an accomplishment. OK, a few times I ‘cheated,’ realizing on the first of a month that I missed the previous one; so I’d write a quickie post and backdate it. (At least I issued a disclaimer announcing the backdating.) I thought about doing that again, but as the days of January marched on, I succumbed to blogging honesty and decided against such chicanery. 

History was also made on January 5th, when this blog celebrated (quietly) its 15th bloggaversary.

I have had some good reasons for missing December 2021 and half of January 2022. Times had gotten a bit difficult. The stress of the Christmas season (from the secular side) plus some personal struggles had contributed to blogging neglect. I have been out of work for a while since the COVID pandemic ended my regular job in 2020. Relying on the additional pandemic unemployment insurance while it lasted, I also had been searching for a work-at-home position. A few came and went; some turned out to be bogus, or otherwise not what they seemed, and in December 2021 things seemingly looked up. I found a ghostwriter content job, which actually turned out to be painful. While I appreciated the opportunity, given the time spent writing, and factoring in the fixed rate of payment for the articles, I’d be making minimum wage. For 1979. And then…

… I found another. I have been a member of a certain online community dedicated to permaculture and homesteading for quite a while and took to the welcoming and informative atmosphere. I won’t mention the specific place for the time being, but after a fashion, I will come back and edit this with the actual identity. (People good with search engines and intuition can probably guess.) Anyway, for some odd reason the community took to me as well, and OK, to make a long story short, the … interesting… fellow who runs the place needed a virtual assistant and I thought, “What the hooey, I’ll try for it.” Well, if I ain’t a worm wriggling around in a fresh compost heap, but I got the job! Been doing it for almost a month. I work six days a week (he’d like seven, but that so isn’t happenin.’ )

Futures are always uncertain, but I had to trust in Divine Providence. The very idea that I’d be working for this dude would have been considered utterly ridiculous just a few months ago. This place relies a lot on volunteers, and they periodically go through a process of ‘promoting’ regular members into positions of greater responsibility in their forums. That happened to me last Summer or Autumn. I was shocked. But in retrospect, I think I can see the hand of Divine Providence at work in it since that ‘promotion’ was the seemingly natural progression of my involvement there since I started in their forums when the pandemic hit. I took to gardening a lot, and the site is a great one for that, and I freely shared my experiences. The site became one of the few ‘happy places’ for me online during the traumas of 2020 (pandemic and the US Presidential election.) 

During all of this I prayed: prayed to get through 2020, then 2021, and through it all that I obtain a ‘job suitable to my talents.’ It took a while, but it finally arrived last month. I could not have applied for this job in 2020, or even during most of 2021. It was only because of the amount of time I spent on the forums, growing in the knowledge of the place which lead to the site’s volunteers noticing me and ‘promoting’ me to a position of responsibility that gave me the confidence that I might have a chance.

There is a lesson in this. And that is PRAYER works, and quite often the answer is in God’s time, not yours. It certainly would have helped for me to have gotten this much earlier, except that it would not have been possible until I had achieved certain skills or a reputation. I like to think, now, that God had been answering this all along, from the Spring of 2020 which coincided with my participation in this particular site. He was shaping me to be the person suitable for this assistant’s job for well over a year. God exists outside of time, and He knows the future that works out from amongst all the possible ones. And He knew that this place would be needing a new assistant for the guy who runs it. And He drew me along, keeping me (somewhat) free of despair over finances and economics until the job was ready and I was ready for it.

Now, this doesn’t mean that I can go all “Lah-dih-dah! God got me this job and I can just do whatever! It’s mine!” No, while I believe He did help me obtain it,  now I have to rely on His graces to keep it and do it well. When God answers your prayers, you have to be grateful, and take it for granted.

Life is interesting. Sometimes I wish it were less so, but it is what it is. OH!! Yumpin’ Yiminy! I almost forgot! NEXT YEAR YOU HAVE TO SAY THIS PRAYER! I THINK IT WAS THE FINAL KEY, THE CORNERSTONE THROUGH WHICH MY JOB SEARCH PRAYERS WERE ANSWERED: The St. Andrew Christmas Novena. It worked! I said it in 2020, with no apparent success. But, as I said above, it may have been part of the manner by which I was ‘prepared,’ for the answer. Leading up to that, I would also like to publicly thank, in no particular order (I sound like I’m an Oscar or Emmy winner thanking all the people who helped me along the way.) St. Maximilian Kolbe, St. Therese of Lisieux, St. Rita of Cascia, St. Faustina Kowalska, St. Pio of Pietrelcina, and St. Joan of Arc. I think they were all the saints I… OH, and St. Gemma Galgani, can’t forget her! And obviously, a BIG SHOUT OUT to the Blessed Virgin Mary and St. Joseph! 

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

About Me Page update and email address change

Posted on by

Hi. Just some minor bookeeping: I updated the About Me Page and noticed that I had incorrect email addresses and like the idiot I am sometimes forgot to update it. I had changed to Yahoo, but have since gone back to using Gmail (temporarily until I finally, after all these years, activate my domain name email.) I just went through my Yahoo inbox and have flagged a few important emails I need to reply to. (Most are spam or subscriptions.) 

Also, on that Page I updated some places where you can find me online. 

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Are You Prepared to Die?

Posted on by

Someday you will die. Me, too. No one is exempt. It will happen, guaranteed. If you have been recently exposed to death because a loved one has passed away, the possibility was brought to your attention. Most everyone is uncomfortable with it and will routinely brush it off. 

An article from long ago asks us this: Are You Prepared to Die? Quote: “The Scripture often emphasizes the suddenness of death and judgment.”

(Via Archdiocese of Washington Blog.)

Well, are you? The reality of death is something many people avoid until it confronts them full on. And even then, some people attempt to shun it.

The inconvenient truth is that we are better prepared to face death when we do not wait to prepare ourselves for it when we are facing it.

The article gives some sobering consideration on preparing for death. November is an opportune time to contemplate it. 

I posted this because yesterday was the anniversary of my Mother’s death in 2005. I was subjected to some serious psychological abuse from members of my family. One in particular, the rest were guilty of ‘sins of omission,’ as in their failure to come to my aid given my vulnerable position. A few did, and for those I am grateful. Nevertheless, the consequences of the antagonist’s actions lead me to contemplate suicide. So, I approached death. I have since been keeping in mind preparations for it (frequent confession, and meditating on if ‘I am ready’ for when it’s time.

NOTE: This is a “retropost,” a post from an old blog I wrote on “The Four Last Things: Death, Judgment, Heaven (& Purgatory) and Hell” that I shuttered a few years ago. Individual posts are very slowly being transferred to either In Exile or Sober Catholic, whichever seems appropriate. Some are backdated, others postdated, in case you’re confused as to why you never saw a particular post if you’re a diligent reader. The process should be completed by early 2022.

 

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

November is almost upon us!

Posted on by

Note: A reblog from a previous year and slightly edited.

November is my favorite month. Mainly because of The Feasts of All Saints on November 1st and All Souls on November 2nd and the general trend in the Church’s liturgical readings in the Mass and Divine Office on Christ’s Coming (First and Second). 

This leads to November being considered the “month of the dead”. While some may find that rather gruesome and macabre, I do not. I like November and its focus on the dead because of the reminder that what is around us is not the whole story, and that something greater lies beyond our reach. But not forever. We too, shall cross over to what lies beyond, and we should always be mindful of our death.

November and its associations with the dead also help me to connect with my loved ones that have died. They do not seem so far away. My Mom died in November (2005) and her death shattered my life, but out of that wreckage came a new life for me. My Dad died years earlier in 1995, and I find that I am becoming more like him in some ways (namely Catholicy). There are others hopefully in Heaven or Purgatory, and I think about them often.

Anyway, with November here there shall be a slight change in focus here at this blog. I mentioned this before: Slight change in direction for Sober Catholic. This is one of a number of posts from my old “death blog” that I edited and republished here. I recently completed the migration of posts from ‘4LT’ to here or my other blog. Many of you observant readers will notice a ‘retropost’ notice at the bottom of the migrated posts. Some were backdated, others postdated, some edited, in case you’re confused as to why you never saw a particular post if you’re a diligent reader. If I recall, I chose the term ‘retropost’ because it implies ‘retroactive’ for those that were backdated, or to ‘retro,’ or ‘old’, ‘back in the day’ posts. 

So, have a Good November, everyone. (May that salutation be likened to a wish for a happy death. (A “Happy Death” in Catholicism is a death in which you end up in Heaven.)

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The Anniversary of my Father’s Death

Posted on by

On this date in 1995 my father died.

He and I weren’t very close, (“fathers and sons …”) generational and attitudinal differences separated us.

As a result, I didn’t really grieve over his death. I mean, I was saddened and did feel the loss, but I wasn’t ripped apart by his death like I was over my Mom’s 10 years later.

This relative lack of impact was aided by the fact that I was 2,500 miles away and hadn’t seen him in 4 years.

I went home for his funeral, and reconnected with the family, but when I returned home to California I continued life as usual. I had started drinking heavily to cope with life’s problems a year before (failed romance) and my drinking picked up a little more upon my return, so that may have softened the need to grieve in a sober manner.

The point of this is that although I wasn’t too close to Dad during his life, I am much closer to him now. That would seem strange to non-Catholics, but for believers with a knowledge of the Communion of Saints, that shouldn’t seem strange at all.

Death doesn’t end a life. Death is just a passage from this life to another. This life is temporary, everything “is”, and then passes away to dust and a dim memory. The life after is eternal. Whether that life is spent in Heaven or Hell depends on what you do in your Earthly life.

There is a connection between those of us still here on Earth and those deceased. It is called, as I referenced in a previous paragraph, the Communion of Saints . (Via New Advent.) This is comprised of the “Church Militant” (those still on Earth), the “Church Suffering” (those in Purgatory) and the “Church Triumphant” (those in Heaven). Only the souls that have damned themselves to Hell are excluded.

“Communion” implies a community, wherein the members still can relate to one another. This relation is conducted by the means of prayer. We pray to the Church Triumphant and the Church Suffering for their intercessory power with God. We can somehow sense their presence (although admittedly that “sensing” may be wishful thinking).

They are there to help, comfort and console us. We are separated from them by the chasm of death, but that chasm can be crossed eventually by our own deathly passage.

I said earlier in this post that I am much closer to Dad now than while he was alive. I have grown to be much like him, at least with regard to the practice of my Catholic Faith. (I still haven’t taken up woodworking as a hobby, nor returned to fishing as a pastime, but may in time. I do enjoy yardwork, like he did, and love baseball, too.) I understand him better as the years progress and as I grow older.

To anyone who has lost a parent (or anyone beloved) to death, fear not. They are not gone from you permanently. Consider them as just having moved far away, and the distance you need to travel to meet with them again will take the rest of your life.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Shhh…. This is a cheat post

Posted on by

I posted something regarding the annual Sober Catholic novena to St.Maximilian Kolbe and noticed in my blog editor that I didn’t post at all in July 2021. That marks the first time that has happened since I began this project in January 2007. Oftentimes I notice near the end of the month that I hadn’t yet posted during it and would cobble up something, anything, and post; I have this crazed dedication to posting at least once a month. 

So, this is a cheat post. It was actually written on August 4th, 2021, but backdated to July 31, 2021. (Just so that the Post Archives dropdown menu doesn’t show a missing month. Oh, yes, I do have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) 😉 

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

On the Sacred Heart of Jesus and me

Posted on by

Today is the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. Devotion to the Sacred Heart is one of the most identifiably Catholic devotions, second only to the Rosary.

It is almost as old. Jesus gave St. Gertrude the Great interior locutions on the 13th Century telling her about the depths of His love for us. Earlier in that same century Our Lady gave St. Dominic the basics of what is the Rosary.

I can’t go into great detail regarding the revelations to St. Gertrude, as I am only beginning to read a classic book on that. Many of us are more familiar with His revelations to St. Margaret Mary Alacoque in the 17 Century which established the modern devotional practices.

The point of this post is simple: Since the beginning of June I’ve been really getting interested in the Sacred Heart Devotion. I’ve been ‘into it’ for years, I’ve done the Nine First Fridays and I am really devoted to visiting Him in the Blessed Sacrament. I’ve meditated using devotional books on it; and I ‘get’ the basic fundamental gist of the devotion: that is the Sacred Heart is Jesus’ intense, sacrificial love for us, and our response to that love by loving Him in return with a love that sets our own hearts and souls aflame; including loving Him on behalf of those who don’t. But for but for some reason the fundamental aspect didn’t really resonate; that may not make all that much sense but the only way I can explain it is that the ‘feeling’ of the Devotion didn’t go too deep. It didn’t move me like the Rosary does and Marian feast days do, or the Divine Mercy Devotion and Divine Mercy Sunday.

But this year is different: I saw that June was coming up and I’m like all excited, “It’s the Sacred Heart Month! It’s the Sacred Heart Month!!” I’m finally reading this book: Love, Peace And Joy: Devotion To The Sacred Heart Of Jesus According To St. Gertrude The Great which is a boon to me; it’s really opened up my heart and mind to the essence of the devotion and its spiritual impact and effects.

Jesus’ love for us is so intense that it supplies what is lacking in our prayers and desires. It ‘fixes our past,’ not by a manner of temporal engineering and changing that past, but by burying our sinful past in His Heart (“Let go, and let God.”) we can find redemption in a tangible manner. The Sacred Heart Devotion, when combined with reception of the Eucharist and visits to the Blessed Sacrament make Jesus feel less like an abstraction and more of a real live entity. No wonder that the Sacred Heart Devotion has been popular amongst those who are more ‘traditional’ and who practice true holy piety (that sense of affectionate respect and love for God and His Church.)

It’s weird, but that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)