Novena through St. Maximilian Kolbe – Day 4

Once again, we continue with this, the 4th Day of our Novena through St. Maximilian Kolbe. As usual, go here and read the prayer while thinking about a loved one who is struggling with addiction, and then contemplate the following:

This would have been my father’s 95th birthday. He died in 1995. I didn’t really grieve over him as we didn’t get along much, plus whatever”grieving” I did was drowned or expressed in alcohol. He was not an alcoholic. The honor of being the “family drunk” goes to me.

My last conversation with him was an argument. It doesn’t matter what it was about. But about 2-3 weeks later I received the phone call from Mom that he had died. I was asked to call a brother of mine as they were having trouble reaching him.

My brother and I hadn’t been on speaking terms ever since I moved out on him 2 1/2 years before. He had been upset that I did unto him (moving) what he was planning on doing unto me. I left a message on his voice mail to “Call home, it’s about Dad.”

This led to a reconciliation of sorts between us that lasted for a decade. We don’t talk much now, but that can change. There was never any reconciliation between my father and I, but that really doesn’t matter anymore.

The reason that doesn’t matter anymore is I do feel that my father is in Heaven, and that he has been observing events in my life and the family’s life as a part of that “great cloud of witnesses” described in Hebrews;

Hebrews 12:1-2

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us while keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, the leader and perfecter of faith. For the sake of the joy that lay before him he endured the cross, despising its shame, and has taken his seat at the right of the throne of God.

He knows what’s going on and he understands why I’ve done things that I did. Plus, any flaws or imperfections of the self that he retained at death were purged from him in Purgatory (as nothing impure can enter Heaven) and there is no longer any reason on my part to hold any resentment against him for anything he did.

The thing is, one shouldn’t wait until after the finality of death to “reconcile” with a loved one. The person that you are praying for in the Novena is a loved one (or once was). That person could die in their addiction, and no chance of a happy life with you would be possible. As hard as it is, it is acknowledged that trust may be hard for you to grant that person. So don’t trust them for now. Wait until they’ve earned it. You do have the right to withhold trust until you feel safe enough to grant it.

But you can love that person. Never withhold that. Love conquers all things, or so I’ve read somewhere. It can heal. And it can heal both ways. To the addict it can be a lifeline, and for you it can heal the wounds inflicted upon you by the addict or alcoholic.

So, take heed the writer of Hebrews admonition to “…let us rid ourselves of every burden and sin that clings to us and persevere in running the race that lies before us while keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus…” Jesus can help you love. Gaze upon Him on the Cross. That’s love. You needn’t get crucified, but you can nail your anger and resentments to that Cross.

Go to the sidebar and under “Labels” and look up “Forgiveness”. Read those posts at your convenience.

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Novena Through St. Maximilian Kolbe – Day 3

On this, the third day of our novena to St. Maximilian Kolbe, please again, go here and say the prayer, thinking of someone you love and know who’s is addicted to drugs and/or alcohol. The consider the following:

The person that you are praying for is probably seeking a short term solution to a long term problem. In a way, this can be a form of suicide, which is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Either way, the person is taking a huge gamble with their immortal soul.

The Church regards addiction to be a mitigating factor if the addictive behavior would otherwise normally be a mortal sin. According to the Catechism, paragraph 1857:

For a sin to be mortal, three conditions must together be met: “Mortal sin is sin whose object is grave matter and which is also committed with full knowledge and deliberate consent.”

Addiction would eliminate the “deliberate consent” condition, and possibly the full knowledge of its mortal nature.

The gamble I was referring to is the possibility of the fine line being crossed if relapse occurs. While the argument can be made that the addictive personality of the individual may always be in place and therefore would always mitigate the mortal nature of the sin, I dislike the potentially cavalier reliance on “mitigation” as it may be a dangerous assumption. If one has relapsed, the possibility remains that the person may satisfy all three conditions of a mortal sin. And that is the reason for this post, while the mitigating factor may always be in place, the danger to their immortal soul is too great to completely discount the possibility of a mortal sin being committed.

The act of alcohol or drug abuse is always a grave matter. But the other two conditions which may not be met due to the addiction, may be met because of the new knowledge the person has about him/herself and the substance abuse. They may have full knowledge of the act’s mortal nature due to their recovery program and Catholic spirituality, and their consent may be a willing consent. It may be a deliberate act, not linked to the corruption of the will by addiction.

The argument can go back and forth, all hinging around whether the person’s consent was freely given and whether they fully understood the act’s mortal nature. A problem lies with whether or not the individual recognizes the distinction between mortal and venial sins, or even recognizes the existence of the two kinds. Sin is either deadly (mortal) or not deadly (venial).

From the First Letter of St. John,

1 John 5:16-17

If anyone sees his brother sinning, if the sin is not deadly, he should pray to God and he will give him life. This is only for those whose sin is not deadly. There is such a thing as deadly sin, about which I do not say that you should pray.
All wrongdoing is sin, but there is sin that is not deadly.

One could argue that why bother being Catholic and developing a strong Catholic spirituality? Ignorance will prevent one from committing mortal sins. Well, the answer is easy. With Catholic Christianity you have the only sure road map, drawn by God Himself, to achieve eternal salvation. And with the sacraments, you have the best way to cleanse yourself of all sin, mortal or venial.

Addictive behavior is still sinful, albeit venial. While there is no mathematical formula that states that a certain number of venial sins equates with one mortal sin, the accumulation of venial sins will still distance yourself from God and His graces.

There is an additional component to the gamble one plays. The short term relief and pleasure achieved by the addictive act, if mortal, trades away the possibility of eternal life with God and loved ones in Heaven. A soul with one or more mortal sins condemns itself to Hell. The few seconds, hours or days of pleasure and relief costs the soul an eternity in paradise.

A stupid gamble.

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Novena through St. Maximilian Kolbe – Day 2

Yesterday we began a Novena through St. Maximilian Kolbe. Please open a new tab or window in your browser and then go here . Read the prayer and after you’ve said it contemplate this:

The person who is trapped in addiction is now where you were. If you are not an addict, “There but for the grace of God” could you also have gone. If you are related, as in family ties, well, you share the same genes and studies have shown there is a genetic factor in addiction. Some dispute that, and I really don’t care why someone is an alcoholic or addict, I am just concerned that they are. I tend to agree with a genetic factor, inasmuch that addicts are different in some way, and perhaps a familial relationship may be something to consider if the addict is a relation.

So, while you are praying for the loved one, also consider your own chances, missed or yet to be. If there is no familial relationship, consider the addict’s family. They are also trapped, although in a different manner.

We are all connected, especially if we are baptized Christians. We are all members of the Body of Christ. If one member is sick, so are the others.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena through St. Maximilian Kolbe – Day 1

St. Maximilian Kolbe was a Polish Franciscan priest who was executed at the Nazi concentration camp at Auschwitz in 1941. He offered himself up in place of another man, who survived the death camp and lived to see Fr. Kolbe’s canonization. More about him can be found at the Consecration and Marytown websites.

St. Kolbe also founded the “Militia of the Immaculata” a Catholic organization dedicated to evangelizing the world. It is dedicated to the Blessed Virgin Mary. All of its members are consecrated (sworn ‘by blood’ to belong to) the Virgin. I am a member. The Consecration site in the previous paragraph is its webpage in the USA. The international site is here .

St. Kolbe, due to the nature of his execution, is one of the patron saints of addicts. Although he was not an alcoholic or an addict, he died by lethal injection in a cell.

The following prayer is a novena for those suffering from an addiction, and is from the MI site above. It should be prayed for nine consecutive days on behalf of anyone suffering from addiction or alcoholism. It doesn’t matter when you pray it, just do it for nine days. Now is a good time as St. Kolbe’s Feast day is August 14th, and your prayers are united with all the other people praying it. (Once an hour for nine consecutive hours in emergency situations is good.)

St. Maximilian Kolbe, your life of love and labor for souls was sacrificed amid the horrors of a concentration camp and hastened to its end by an injection of a deadly drug.

Look with compassion upon (name of person) who is now entrapped in addiction to drugs or alcohol and whom we now recommend to your powerful intercession. Having offered your own life to preserve that of a family man, we turn to you with trust, confident that you will understand and help.

Obtain for us the grace never to withhold our love and understanding, nor to fail in persevering prayer that the enslaving bonds of addiction may be broken and that full health may be restored to him/her whom we love.

We will never cease to be grateful to God who has helped us and heard your prayer for us. Amen.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)