Category Archives: Prayer

Pray for us sinners

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A thought had popped into my mind while praying the Rosary today…

The line in the second verse, “…pray for us sinners…” struck me.

It reads “pray for us sinners,” not “pray for me, a sinner.”

The Rosary is the devotional prayer most closely associated with Catholics. And rightly so, with the prayer’s popularity over the centuries and given that at any one time, there are probably hundreds of thousands (or more!) Catholics praying it around the clock, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.

Someone, somewhere, right now, is praying a Rosary. Which mean that given the “pray for us sinners,” wording, there are thousands of people asking the Blessed Mother’s intercession for everyone and for each other, including you, right now.

A sobering thought, especially if you’re going through a bad time. You are not alone. Someone, actually, a whole massive number of someones, are praying for you right now.

Maybe you should pick up a Rosary and pray for them in return.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Divine Mercy Novena begins on Good Friday

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Just giving all my readers a heads up that the Divine Mercy Novena begins on Good Friday.

Information on how to pray it is in the link in the first sentence.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Forgiveness and the Adversary

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The concept of “forgiveness” has been on my mind recently, especially after this post. Obviously it is something that I’ve struggled with. The following comprises a summation of my recent internal debates.

OK, forgiveness… what does that mean? In the context of this blog, it will be in connection with the Catholic Faith. And thus we think of “Confession.” So, what takes place then? We go to Confession to confess our sins to a priest who, acting in the power vested in him by the Church absolves us of our sins. God forgives us and absolves us through the office of the priest.

So, the slate is wiped clean. We had offended God in some manner; we have abused our natural gifts in a way contrary to God’s will and intentions and we caused a disruption in our relationship with Him. A deadly rupture if the sins were mortal, less so if venial. In utilizing the Sacrament of Confession the wounds are healed and we move on in our relationship with God.

How does this apply to relationships with humans? Someone hurts me, I am wounded and the relationship suffers. How much depends on the extent of the offense. If little, it is easy to forgive; if not, forgiveness takes some effort.

Is the slate wiped clean? Perhaps. If the offense is great and the wound is deep, I interpret forgiveness to mean that I put the hurt and pain behind me, it is back there and I no longer dwell on it and nurture a resentment. I no longer ask “Why did it happen?” or seek any answers. If the action is recalled, the pain may return but I can dismiss it (with varying degrees of success dependent upon my state of mind.)

Forgiveness doesn’t imply reconciliation will follow; ideally it should as that would mirror our relationship with God and that is the model we seek in our dealings with others. However, other people are not God and thus reconciliation may not follow. In fact, oftentimes it shouldn’t if the protagonist has not repented and atoned for their offense.

OK. So we have established that forgiveness means the event is “back there,” and not emotionally connected to the present. You do not nurture the hurt by resenting the action. You no longer want to know “Why?” You no longer seek answers. Forgiveness has been made; if possible directly with the individual(s) so the relationship can be patched up or just unilaterally if you cannot deal with the other.

The problem I was having is that I thought that “forgiveness” didn’t “take hold” if the hurt keeps coming back. Perhaps it is natural for memories of the hurt to resurface from time to time. Much depends upon our ability to exercise self-control and discipline over our thought-life, but even then we are only human and if the pain was really deep it may never go away. I am referring to pain that was so intense that you yearned for death to end it and therefore contemplated suicide.

Nevertheless, perhaps the act of forgiveness needs to be done again. In some way, either by prayer and meditation, you contemplate the event and just turn it over to God. Let it become subject to His Justice and Mercy and try to leave it there. Praying to the Blessed Virgin and entrusting the whole matter to her is a part of this; Mary is our tender Mother and understands sorrow all too well.

And then another thought came to me: that recurring memories of a past hurt may just be intrusions of Satan into our inner life. The Adversary is observant; It knows very well what has hurt us. Perhaps It had even been the instrument behind the other peoples’ hurting of us. Satan does not want us to make progress spiritually; It desires our continued dwelling in the World and our adoption of the Worlds’ morals and ethics (which are clearly NOT conducive to getting you to Heaven). And so It oppresses us. Satan knows our weaknesses and propagates them as often as It can. If It is aware that a past hurt can distract us and weaken our path towards God, then who’s to say that Satan isn’t sometimes behind the development of resentments? That obsessing about a past event and having strong feelings about the whole matter isn’t Its way of causing us more harm to our souls? Imagining confrontations with the perpetrators and “getting even” in some way?

Whether it is demonic oppression (as distinct from demonic possession) or something less grave may not matter. It just means that we have more work to do in trusting in God’s Providence and Mercy. By ourselves we can do nothing; as they say in Twelve Step movements, “Let Go and Let God” so that He can establish His peace in our lives.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Love your enemies

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In this excerpt from the Gospel for the Mass of Saturday of the First Week of Lent (Matthew 5:44) Jesus exhorts us to: “Love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you. And pray for those who persecute and slander you.”

Courtesy: Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

Not easy for anyone, especially those of us who are in recovery and have a past littered with problematic relationships.

Jesus is asking us to make amends. Matthew 5 has a number of passages on this; just earlier in this chapter Jesus is warning us to make amends to our ‘brother’ before offering a sacrifice if there is anything between you both.

It is not easy, at all, to “love” those who took issue with our drinking, especially if we gave them reason to hate us for our behavior. Given all of this, it is difficult to come around in our recovery to try and approach them with love. But we try. We love them in our hearts, we do our best to do good to and for them. We pray for them.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Deeds, Words, Prayer

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In “Divine Mercy in My Soul,” the spiritual diary of St. Faustina Kowalska (for info read this: St. Faustina and Divine Mercy) Jesus communicates to St. Faustina something important about mercy:

“I am giving you three ways of exercising mercy toward your neighbor: the first – by deed, the second – by word, the third – by prayer. In these three degrees is contained the fullness of mercy, and it is an unquestionable proof of love for me. By this means a soul glorifies and pays reverence to My mercy.” (Diary paragraph 742)

This is a possible Lenten practice. Obviously, not just for Lent, but keep in mind that the best Lents are those that transform us into Jesus and thus what we become at the end of the season we should try and maintain afterwards. And thus, practicing these “three ways of mercy” during Lent will assist you in venerating His mercy and helping you become more merciful.

Given these increasingly trying times, mercy is certainly needed more than ever. Consider what Jesus told St. Faustina: “Mankind will not have peace until it turns with trust to My Mercy.” (Diary paragraph 300)

So, the first way is “deeds of mercy.” There are the 14 Works of Mercy identified by the Church:

Corporal Works of Mercy

Feed the hungry
Give drink to the thirsty
Shelter the Homeless
Clothe the naked
Visit the Sick
Visit the imprisoned
Bury the dead

Spiritual Works of Mercy

Correct the sinner
Instruct the ignorant
Counsel the doubting
Comfort the sorrowful
Be patient with those in error
Forgive offenses
Pray for the living and the dead

There is also this, from St. Faustina’s Diary, paragraph 163:

“O Lord. I want to be completely transformed into Your mercy and to be Your living reflection. May the greatest of all divine attributes, that of Your unfathomable mercy, pass through my heart and soul to my neighbor.

Help me, O Lord, that my eyes may be merciful, so that I may never suspect or judge from appearances, but look for what is beautiful in my neighbors’ souls and come to their rescue.

Help me, O Lord, that my ears may be merciful, so that I may give heed to my neighbors’ needs and not be indifferent to their pains and moanings.

Help me, O Lord, that my tongue may be merciful, so that I should never speak negatively of my neighbor, but have a word of comfort and forgiveness for all.

Help me, O Lord, that my hands may be merciful and filled with good deeds, so that I may do only good to my neighbors and take upon myself the more difficult and toilsome tasks.

Help me, O Lord, that my feet may be merciful, so that I may hurry to assist my neighbor, overcoming my own fatigue and weariness

Help me, O Lord, that my heart may be merciful so that I myself may feel all the sufferings of my neighbor.”

Study that prayer and see how you can apply it everyday. I try. It’s not easy.

The second way is “words of mercy.” Be mindful of your speech. Be kind in your discourse with other people. Stop gossiping. Let rumors die with you. Stop being harsh; especially on the Internet, whether in Facebook debates and Twitter wars, knock off the crap. It’s not as if you’re going to actually change someone’s mind, anyway. At least not if you’re using vitriol.

Lastly, “prayers of mercy.” Pray for others. Start praying DAILY the Divine Mercy Chaplet.

Get going!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

I sought the Lord and he answered me

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An excerpt from the Responsorial Psalm for the Mass for Tuesday of the First Week of Lent:

(Psalm 34:5) I sought the Lord, and he heeded me, and he carried me away from all my tribulations.

Courtesy Sacred Bible: Catholic Public Domain Version

Seek the Lord and you will find Him. Perhaps not in the manner that you’d expect or the way you hoped. He will respond in the way best suited for your salvation.

This passage from the Psalms carries with it much hope for the alcoholic and addict still suffering, or for anyone having difficulties accepting the Cross of their recovery. (We all may learn we have our own Simon of Cyrene in our lives. We have to hope that we can recognize him or her.)

We have to keep in mind that God’s response to our prayers is in His time and not ours. We may have to endure in our tribulations; but this just means in the end we will emerge stronger and more secure in our partnership with God and our reliance on Divine Providence is bearing fruit.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

In the heart

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In this excerpt from the First Reading from today’s Mass for Ash Wednesday we read: “…rend your hearts and not your garments.” (Joel 2:13)

As I said a few days ago “I have been reading quite a lot of Marian spirituality and theology over the past few years.” My interior life has grown as a result, which is not surprising considering that she “…pondered things in her heart…” (Luke 2:19). When you learn in the “School of Mary” you cannot help but develop a richer interior spiritual life which is centered in the heart.

This is connected to the Gospel from today’s Mass, in which Jesus admonishes us to:

“…go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. “ (Matthew 6:6)

I’m told the practice of “rending your garments” was done in the Temple or in public to demonstrate the strength of a person’s piety or outrage at something offensive (to God. Remember the chief priest rending his garment during Jesus’ Passion.) But it is a public display. The readings emphasize the importance of the interior life, of repenting and converting and making your “heart” and acceptable place for the Lord to dwell.

The Blessed Mother is an excellent model for us in this. Ask her to help you this Lent; pray for her to guide you through this Holy season which culminates in the Passion, Death and Resurrection of her Son which so greatly pierced her heart (Luke 2:35). Lent is our time to grow closer to the Lord, what better teacher than she who quite likely spent her entire life pondering Him in her Immaculate Heart?

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Consecration of Sober Catholic to Mary

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This blog has a new patron. As today is February 11th, traditionally the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes (and the World Day of the Sick), I have decided to consecrate Sober Catholic to the Blessed Virgin Mary.

I have mentioned previously (most recently today, in Our Lady of Lourdes/World Day of the Sick) that it is my belief that Mary ‘inspired’ me to start this. Perhaps that was a fruit of my own consecration to her on October 7, 2002 through St. Maximilian Kolbe’s Militia of the Immaculate (see that earlier link). One of the things about consecrating yourself to Mary is that she uses you to bring others to Jesus through her. By whatever means that you have, she uses. Your intellect, memory, will, skills and talents; all of these then belong to her for her to use in saving souls. St. Maximilian Kolbe often said it was like being a paintbrush in an artist’s hands. It paints when the artist selects it, remains at rest when not needed. It may have painted a masterpiece, but it was the artist who directed it.

It may seem like an arrogant assumption that the Mother of God inspired me to start blogging about the Catholic Faith and the rich resources it offers people in recovery. If so, then this blog will eventually cease and be forgotten. If not, then it continue on until Heaven decides it’s time… But since it’s been 11 years, and I’m still doing it, though many times I wanted to quit, but haven’t…

So I keep trudging on.

I have been reading quite a lot of Marian spirituality and theology over the past few years. I have a greater appreciation for my membership in the M.I. and have read copious amounts of St. Maximilian’s writings as well as numerous texts related to his Marian spirituality. I have learned many things, some of which I shall try and share with you over time. I am no longer astonished at the importance that the Catholic Church has made of the Blessed Mother. This may seem contradictory: on the one hand I have always taken for granted her role in the Church, namely the importance ascribed to her by virtue of her selection by God the Father as the means by which the Incarnation would take place and her role as Mother of the Church and our Mother; and on the other hand my digging into the theology and spirituality (all of the Marian Dogmas) of all this begats the astonishment. So, “astonishment” as in not from shock at all the glories attributed to her, but rather the significance of them all. It’s like the difference between knowing the ‘whats’ of a thing and then learning the ‘whys.’ (As a digression: Growing up ‘raised in the Faith’ I knew many of the ‘whats’ of the Faith, but few of the ‘whys.’ Hence my leaving of the Church for 15 years. Parents and directors of religious education, as well as RCIA instructors take heed; it isn’t enough to educate others on ‘what’ the Church teaches, but also ‘why’ She teaches what She does.)

And so we come to the consecration. In one of my recent readings I was reminded that as we are created by God, He is our first beginning and our last end; everything we have were given by Him, and thus everything we do and the results are His. We do the best we can and leave the results to Him. And so, we all do have a mission. Mulling this over, and being mindful of the possible Marian inspiration of this blog, I came to the conclusion that rather than merely assuming that my personal consecration to the Virgin Mary covers this blog also (since it is something I run, and therefore a tool of hers to use by means of me,) I should in some way “give it back” to her; in doing so I feel a greater responsibility in making it work.

You see, although Our Lady may have inspired it, it has been my will most of the time to blog. I will blog about this or that, I won’t blog for now, I will… I will… I will… I will… She gave me the idea and I took it over. Although oftentimes I felt inspired to “get out of myself” and blog when I didn’t feel like it, and many times while composing a post I felt the words coming from …somewhere…; still, my will decided things most times.

So, no longer will it be ‘my will be done,’ but rather ‘her will be done;’ and as her will is always perfectly conformed to His will…

In consecrating this blog to Mary I will daily pray about it; every morning I will add this apostolate to my prayer intentions. Although I have prayed for the success of this blog in the past, I never made it a daily habit. In praying about it I will hopefully be receptive to any ‘inspirations’ of what to blog about. Daily Mass readings, something I’ve read here or there, something a personal nature, whatever.

So, Mama Mary, this thing is yours. Any ‘productivity’ and success, such as souls saved, sobriety achieved or maintained, lost sheep brought back to Holy Mother Church, are yours. Perhaps I will even get to writing some more Sober Catholic Books! Failures are all mine.

Act of Consecration to the Blessed Virgin Mary, as per St. Maximilian Maria Kolbe and tweaked a bit by me:

O Immaculata, Queen of Heaven and earth, refuge of sinners and our most loving Mother, God has willed to entrust the entire order of mercy to you. I, ‘Paulcoholic’, a repentant sinner, cast myself at your feet humbly imploring you to take me with all that I am and have, but in particular this blog, SoberCatholic.com, wholly to yourself as your possession and property. Please make of me, of all my powers of soul and body, of my whole life, death and eternity, whatever most pleases you.

If it pleases you, use all that I am and have without reserve, wholly to accomplish what was said of you: “She will crush your head,” and, “You alone have destroyed all heresies in the world.” Let me be a fit instrument in your immaculate and merciful hands for introducing and increasing your glory to the maximum in all the many strayed and indifferent souls, and thus help extend as far as possible the blessed kingdom of the most Sacred Heart of Jesus. For wherever you enter, you obtain the grace of conversion and growth in holiness, since it is through your hands that all graces come to us from the most Sacred Heart of Jesus.

V. Allow me to praise you, O sacred Virgin.

R. Give me strength against your enemies.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Death as a passage

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What do you think of death? Is it something to be feared, avoided and denied? Like many people do you ignore it and hope it never bothers you?

I have had a relationship with death stretching back to my childhood. Not that I lost anyone close to me during that time, but I feared that I would. My Mom had celebrated her 47th birthday 11 days before I was born. Dad turned 50 a few months before that. I thought nothing of it until I went to school at age 5. At school events (choir, plays, etc.) I noticed right away that the other kid’s parents seemed different. I discovered that they were younger. They were farther away from death than my parents were. Death… as in going away permanently. I didn’t much like that. I was convinced that at any time Mom and Dad were going to die. I developed the habit of checking their chests while they were napping to see if they were breathing. This continued long after I reached adulthood during vacations home and after I returned home from California in 1995 to care for Mom.

My adult experience of death has been defined by my Mom’s dying in November 2005, and the subsequent griefwork (grief counseling, namely online discussion forums, in person counseling and grief support groups.) After the initial period which lasted well over a year, I developed the notion that death isn’t something to be feared. Sure, I would rather have my Mom and other loved ones still around, but as I moved past the pain and agony of the loss, I was able to see and understand the “Communion of Saints” doctrine of the Church as something of a comfort. This great “cloud of witnesses” that St. Paul writes about in Hebrews 12 may include our beloved dead, gone on before us. They form a part of the Church along with us. Those in Heaven being members of the Church Triumphant, while we still on Earth as a part of the Church Militant. Together with the Church Suffering (those souls in Purgatory) we all comprise the Mystical Body of Christ. We are all members of a community of believers, and as a community can still have a relational bond.

Through prayer and devotion to the deceased, we can still maintain our relationships with them. They are not completely gone. We obviously cannot interact with them as we once did, but it is uncharitable and cynical to regard them as forgotten or “gone” . They are just beyond from where we are.

Therefore, death ceases to be a means by which our beloved are taken away and are gone. Death becomes a passage through which our beloved experience the joy of entering into the presence of God, the domain of eternity where He is.

Ultimately it is a passage that we need to think about and meditate upon. Unlike most times where we focus upon the destination rather than the road, this passage is significant unto itself. Everyone will experience it. Regardless of what you believe happens after death, it is universal. Happens to everyone. Whether the passage of death leads one to Heaven or Hell depends upon the choices we make while alive. Therefore death as a passage forces this consideration of our daily living. How do we live?

If your attention is focused upon Heaven, and you consciously yearn for that place which is our true home, the death is to be welcomed and not feared. Perhaps not desired, but certainly not looked upon with dread.

And definitely a motivation to repent and reform our lives and practice our recovery principles.

Death is our way home.

NOTE: This post is reblogged from another blog of mine on Death, Judgment, Heaven and Hell that is discontinued. Relevant posts on recovery are being migrated one at a time over the next few years to Sober Catholic.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

EWTN Daily Mass Homily on Matt Talbot!

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Last Friday I happened to watch the Daily Mass on EWTN. Fr. Joseph Mary had a nice homily on Matt Talbot! He even mentioned that there is a miracle attributed to Matt that is being considered for possible beatification!

He also read two prayers written by Matt:

Oh most sweet Jesus, mortify within me all that is bad, make it die.

and

In company, guard your tongue; in your family, guard your temper; when alone, guard your thoughts.

Fr. Joseph begins talking about Matt at the 5:00 mark, and the prayers he reads at the 10:03 mark. At 10:54 he mentions the story behind the possible miracle.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)