Category Archives: Suffering

Build your house upon a rock

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An excerpt from today’s Gospel on the Ninth Sunday in Ordinary Time speaks to us about the strength of faith and living according to Jesus’ teachings:

Mt 7:24-27;

Everyone who listens to these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on rock.
The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and buffeted the house. But it did not collapse; it had been set solidly on rock.
And everyone who listens to these words of mine but does not act on them will be like a fool who built his house on sand.
The rain fell, the floods came, and the winds blew and buffeted the house. And it collapsed and was completely ruined.”

Quite simply, if you live according to the teachings of Jesus you will survive whatever life throws at you. It will not always be easy, as depicted by the symbolism of the storms and waves crashing upon the rock the house was built upon. But you will make it through. That is tough to remember, but important. Many times I was about to quit and give up, but persevered and found serenity.

Jesus will never abandon you. Do not abandon Him.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Matt Talbot for Alcoholics: Day 2

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Today we pray the second day of our Novena to Matt Talbot for Alcoholics. Like yesterday we begin with:

PRAYER FOR THE ADDICTED

God of mercy, we bless You in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ, who ministered to all who come to Him. Give Your strength to N., Your servant, bound by the chains of addiction. Enfold him/her in Your love and restore him/her to the freedom of God’s children. Lord, look with compassion on all those who have lost their health and freedom. Restore to them the assurance of Your unfailing mercy, and strengthen them in the work of recovery. To those who care for them, grant patient understanding and a love that perseveres. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

The person that you are praying for may have reached the “jumping off place”, that is, that moment when they hit their bottom and decide whether to live or to die.

Think about the intersection point they have arrived at. Two roads lead ahead, one is the path towards death in which they know that if they continue to drink they will die. The other is the path towards life in which they think that if they stop drinking, they only wish they were dead. Life appears too difficult to cope with without alcohol and wishing for death is an attractive escape. But there is that glimmer of hope, the hope that there is a answer or solution to the despair.

Who knows what intervenes in that point. Why some people choose the path to life as opposed to death. Some grace of God filters through the despair and leads them out, and for others this grace is absent or ignored. The despair is too great.

Pray for all those at this “jumping off place”. Pray that they somehow respond to the grace of God and live.

And pray also for those who chose death. By the workings of God’s grace and mercy they may be saved, and it is never too late to pray for them. No one knows what happens at the moment of death.

Be grateful that God’s mercy is greater than ours.

We conclude the daily novena with:

Official Prayer for the Canonization of Blessed Matt Talbot

“Lord, in your servant, Matt Talbot you have given us a wonderful example of triumph over addiction, of devotion to duty, and of lifelong reverence of the Holy Sacrament. May his life of prayer and penance give us courage to take up our crosses and follow in the footsteps of Our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Father, if it be your will that your beloved servant should be glorified by your Church, make known by your heavenly favours the power he enjoys in your sight. We ask this through the same Jesus Christ Our Lord. Amen.”

The source of these prayers is Circle of Prayer – Matt Talbot Intercedes for Alcoholics .

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Matt Talbot for Alcoholics: Day 1

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Today we pray Day One of our Novena to Matt Talbot for Alcoholics. We begin with:

PRAYER FOR THE ADDICTED

God of mercy, we bless You in the name of Your Son, Jesus Christ, who ministered to all who come to Him. Give Your strength to N., Your servant, bound by the chains of addiction. Enfold him/her in Your love and restore him/her to the freedom of God’s children. Lord, look with compassion on all those who have lost their health and freedom. Restore to them the assurance of Your unfailing mercy, and strengthen them in the work of recovery. To those who care for them, grant patient understanding and a love that perseveres. We ask this through Christ our Lord. Amen.

Pick a person in your life that you know is struggling with alcohol or some other addiction. You can pray for yourself, but if praying for others rather than ourselves we often find our own lives bettered. But if you’re still in the serious throes of addiction, then pray for yourself. Others reading this novena will pray for those who have to pray for themselves.

But think about that person. And that individual is still a person, regardless of their condition. Is he/she still caught in their addiction? Or are they clean and sober for awhile but are just going through a rough patch that is threatens their sobriety? But for the grace of God go you.

Pray for that they be strengthened, that their faith become a rock upon which the hazards of daily living crash upon and disperse.

We conclude the daily novena with:

Official Prayer for the Canonization of Blessed Matt Talbot

“Lord, in your servant, Matt Talbot you have given us a wonderful example of triumph over addiction, of devotion to duty, and of lifelong reverence of the Holy Sacrament. May his life of prayer and penance give us courage to take up our crosses and follow in the footsteps of Our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Father, if it be your will that your beloved servant should be glorified by your Church, make known by your heavenly favours the power he enjoys in your sight. We ask this through the same Jesus Christ Our Lord. Amen.”

The source of these prayers is Circle of Prayer – Matt Talbot Intercedes for Alcoholics .

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Day 6 of the Novena to the Holy Spirit for Alcoholism and Recovery

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On this day of the novena to the Holy Spirit, we petition for the gift of fortitude.

As before, we start with the prayer:

Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of Your faithful and rekindle in them the fire of Your love. Send forth Your Spirit, and they shall be created and you shall renew the face of the Earth.

Fortitude is inner strength, a courage to face adversity. We also know this as the ability to endure and suffer through trials, troubles and tribulations.

We alcoholics know all these way too well.

Lack of true fortitude drove us to drink. Alcohol afforded us a false sense of fortitude. We needed to “fortify” ourselves before any stressful endeavor. Anything that we knew would be a source of anxiety was an excuse for a drink.

Alcoholics and addicts sometimes talk of a “hole in the soul” that their addiction filled. Upon recovery that hole is filled by the grace of God and His increased presence in it. Fortitude may be one of the most direct gifts of this “hole filling” presence of God. With an increased devotion to the Lord, and a transfer from alcohol and drugs to God for our spiritual fulfillment, we may find the inner strength needed to take on and handle our daily troubles.

Oh, Holy Spirit, bestow upon me the gift of fortitude so that I may see through my sufferings today and bear witness to the strength that faith and hope in You brings. I ask this in the name of Jesus, the Lord.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Day 1 of Novena to the Holy Spirit for Addictions and Recovery

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Beginning Prayer:

Come Holy Spirit, fill the hearts of Your faithful and rekindle in them the fire of Your love. Send forth Your Spirit, and they shall be created and you shall renew the face of the Earth.

Ask the Holy Spirit for healing during this Novena. Regardless of how long you have been sober, most of us are all still one or more drinks away from returning to our previous status as practicing alcoholics. Even if you are still in the death grip of alcohol, there is still time. When there is still life, there is still hope. God allows u-turns!

Why might there still be the threat of drinking? Perhaps we still are at odds with how to handle sobriety. Reality is still difficult to cope with on its terms. All of us, sober or not, need the Advocate, the Holy Spirit to guide us on our way. He is the real “Higher Power,” the only One through whom God the Father guides and protects His own.

We have nine days of prayer and meditation before Pentecost Sunday. Spend the time wisely. Daily petition the Holy Spirit to help you. Reciting the prayer beginning each day’s novena is good, as well as adding your own humble requests.

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I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

When He was insulted, He returned no insult; when He suffered, He did not threaten

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A section of Scripture from last night’s Evening Prayer offers an excellent example on humble and sober living.

1 Peter 2 : 21-24;

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example that you should follow in his footsteps.
“He committed no sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth.”
When he was insulted, he returned no insult; when he suffered, he did not threaten; instead, he handed himself over to the one who judges justly.

Many times in our drinking past we dove into our bottle after an insult, either real or imagined. When we suffered, either from something done to us by others or by a self-inflicted wound, we drank.

As sober alcoholics and users we cannot react that way. We have to adopt a more humble manner of living and thinking.

Jesus knew that there is only one judge, God. Rather than taking matters into His own hands and lashing back at His accusers and dying anyway, He meekly accepted their attacks and fulfilled His mission on Earth.

This is not to say that we should be doormats in sobriety and allow injustices to be perpetrated against us.

In the chapter entitled “Acceptance was the Answer” in AA’s “Big Book” (aka Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th edition, 2001; Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. New York), the author declares on page 420:

Perhaps the best thing of all for me is to remember that my serenity is inversely proportional to my expectations. The higher my expectations … the lower is my serenity. I can watch my serenity level rise when I discard my expectations. But them my “rights” try to move in, and they too can force my serenity level down. I have to discard my “rights,” as well as my expectations, by asking myself, “How important is it, really? How important is it compared to my serenity, my emotional sobriety?…

So by asking the question: “How important is it, really? How important is it compared to my serenity, my emotional sobriety?” we can perhaps justify certain situations when we have to defend our “rights”, bearing in mind the cost. The Serenity Prayer can offer guidance:

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

–Reinhold Niebuhr

Anyway, some stuff to think about as we go about our day.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

I lay bare my distress

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A reading from tonight’s Evening Prayer reminded me of God’s availability during times of suffering:

Psalm 142: 2-4;

With full voice I cry to the LORD; with full voice I beseech the LORD.
Before God I pour out my complaint, lay bare my distress.
My spirit is faint within me, but you know my path.

No matter the trouble you are having, God is always near to hear your plaintive scream for help. No matter the seeming insignificance or overwhelming deluge of the problem, unload and vent to God, “lay bare” your “distress” . You may feel weak and strung out, but God knows the path that you’re on and how your current troubles will ultimately lead to your salvation. For that is essentially the meaning of all suffering, as Jesus suffered for our sins, we must accept any that comes our way. Not in any masochistic need, just a humble awareness that as Christians we too must take up our cross and follow Jesus.

Suffering is also an effect of the Original Sin that Jesus died for. So to reject suffering is to reject the true nature of the world and to ultimately resent God if you cannot reconcile the world today with the essential existence of suffering. This may be rather difficult to contemplate and accept while going through trials, so all the more reason to turn immediately to God and with your “full voice”, “cry out” and “beseech the Lord”. Pray. Pray hard.

The Lord knows your path. He knows what special mission you are on, the unique and special purpose that He called you into being for. He will see you through your troubles.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

The Way, the Truth, and the Life

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The Gospel from today’s Mass for Friday of the 4th Week of Easter is a very hopeful and encouraging passage for people seeking a way out of alcoholism and addiction.

John 14:1-6;

Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You have faith in God; have faith also in me. In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If there were not, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back again and take you to myself, so that where I am you also may be. Where I am going you know the way.” Thomas said to him, “Master, we do not know where you are going; how can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

There are many paths to sobriety. Twelve Step movements and the newer alternative paths out of alcoholism and addiction help people cope with sobriety and being clean. Many people stop there, feeling that merely not drinking and drugging is enough. This is fine, particularly if your life as an drinker or user was for a very long time. (My drinking career was 10 years, not long by most standards.) Others feel that merely being clean and sober isn’t enough.

And so they go beyond sobriety movements and seek out a deeper spirituality. Many return to the religion of their youth in the hopes of returning to a path they were derailed off of. Others don’t bother and try new things.

I returned to the religion of my youth, Catholicism. To me, even during my fallen away days, it seemed that it was the real Christianity, that all others were well-meaning but inferior in some way. No disrespect intended, it was just my gut feeling.

Back to the Gospel reading from today. Jesus is the only true way to the Father, no one can get to Him except through Jesus. There may be other paths to salvation, but none, not one, has the guarantee of God Himself that if you follow His Son, you will be saved. This is the one sure reason to justify being a Christian, we alone have the roadmap to salvation written by God. And we Catholics have the Church He established to carry out and safeguard His teachings until He returns again to judge us all.

Twelve Step and alternative paths of recovery do the job they intend to do, with varying degrees of success. But they only cover a part of the problem. While they do a good job of keeping people clean and sober when the work, the tendency of people to just stay sober or follow an easy spiritual path because it is, well, easy, happens too often.

Jesus is the only sure path to salvation. He also came to heal the sick and the broken. His Church has the tools necessary for healing, just as Jesus Himself healed. These are the sacraments that He instituted, such as Holy Communion and Confession. Through prayer and meditation and the participation in these sacraments, we can be healed of our addictions to the point where they simply are not an option to use when things are difficult. In fact, a central point of Christianity, and in particular Catholicism, is that we must accept difficulties (i.e. suffering) as essential in being disciples of Christ. Catholic Christianity heals us, body and soul, in a manner far more complete and essential that mere sobriety programs. They may be useful tools in addition to Catholicism, but only deal with one area, your mental health. Your soul still needs work.

That is why nearly a year-and-a-half ago I started this blog. I had looked all over the web for Catholic sites dealing with sobriety, but found not much. No blogs or other readily updated and interactive sites. I had hoped to introduce people who are seeking a deeper spirituality than that offered by recovery movements the opportunity to see how the Catholic faith and spirituality can help you stay sober and more importantly, grow closer to God. That hope continues after some periods of inactivity these past 6 months. (Note to regular readers: That random inactivity may be over as I have settled into my new job and new life as a husband. From now on there shouldn’t be major interruptions to blogging, as a normal, albeit grander life has returned.)

Follow Jesus and His Church. Just as Jesus is the Way, the Truth and the Life, so is His Church (problems and all. The Truth and Holiness of the Catholic Church is found in her teachings, not the behavior of her members.) . If you’re new to reading Sober Catholic, take some time and randomly read articles in the archive. If you’ve been here before, regular blogging has (hopefully) returned.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

You will be like gods

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An excerpt from the First Reading from today’s Mass for the First Sunday of Lent:

Genesis 3:1-7;

Now the serpent was the most cunning of all the animals that the LORD God had made. The serpent asked the woman, “Did God really tell you not to eat from any of the trees in the garden?”
The woman answered the serpent: “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden; it is only about the fruit of the tree in the middle of the garden that God said, ‘You shall not eat it or even touch it, lest you die.'”
But the serpent said to the woman: “You certainly will not die!
No, God knows well that the moment you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like gods who know what is good and what is bad.”
The woman saw that the tree was good for food, pleasing to the eyes, and desirable for gaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it; and she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it.
Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they realized that they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made loincloths for themselves.

This is the explanation for the cause of evil and suffering in the world. We humans are responsible for a decision in which we believed that we can be like gods and decide for ourselves what is morally good and what is not. It isn’t in today’s reading, but the next verses from Genesis Chapter 3 detail the punishment God meted out to our first parents and their progeny. Read on and decide, “Yes, that explains evil in the world and why life is a succession of toil and drudgery.” Granted there are breaks in between full of beauty and peace, but essentially things are tough because we chose long ago to decide for ourselves to be arbiters of morality and justice. This was wrong as before this we had lived in perfect harmony with God, therefore what need had we to try exalt ourselves to His position, the source of all that is good and moral? For our arrogance we Fell and life is the way it is.

One reason I started this blog was due to my perception that this was in a way being replicated in Alcoholics Anonymous meetings, at least where and when I attended them. But in reading AA literature such as the Grapevine magazine and online forums, I think it is common elsewhere. The concept of AA’s “Higher Power” had drifted away from it’s original intent. It had been designed to enable religious members of the early AA to continue to believe in whatever their concept of God was, as taught by their religious tradition. It has come to mean that “It doesn’t matter what you believe in, as long as you believe in something”. It has become to be used as an excuse for disavowing organized religion (particularly Catholicism as it is the example used most often) and just doing whatever feels nice and spiritual to you. The “Higher Power” has become God designed in our own image.

God made us, not we Him. By creating Him in our image as the “Higher Power” concept has devolved into merely serves to permit people to follow the path of least resistance morally. We decide for ourselves what is moral and what is not, by our own self-determined convictions. This is not the way to believe or behave as Christians, Catholic or otherwise.

We have a clearly defined moral path as laid out in Sacred Scripture and authoritatively interpreted and taught by the Church. We go our own way and we repeat the Original Sin of Adam and Eve.

It’s a tough road to trudge, submitting to a power greater than yourself and the earthly institution He created. No getting around that. Easier and softer ways in one’s relationship with God may be all feel-good and inoffensive, but ultimately unfullfilling.

But on the other hand, it’s the tried and true roadmap to eternal peace and happiness. Really, not a tough decision.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Help for those who are tested

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From the Second Reading from today’s morning Mass, the Feast of the Presentation of the Lord:

Hebrews 2:14-18;

Since the children share in blood and flesh, Jesus likewise shared in them, that through death he might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the Devil, and free those who through fear of death had been subject to slavery all their life. Surely he did not help angels but rather the descendants of Abraham; therefore, he had to become like his brothers and sisters in every way, that he might be a merciful and faithful high priest before God to expiate the sins of the people. Because he himself was tested through what he suffered, he is able to help those who are being tested.

I’ll repeat the last line: Because he himself was tested through what he suffered, he is able to help those who are being tested.

Every one of us faces tests on a daily basis. Some of us more than others. For anyone suffering from an addiction, either still enslaved by it or recovering from it, the tests can be brutal. All sorts of things attack us daily and the answer is sometimes presented as: “Just one wouldn’t hurt. What harm can just one do?”

Plenty, as we all know.

Because Jesus Himself was tested, He can assist us, we can call upon Him to increase our strength, (or increase His strength within us). He was tested for 40 days in the desert by Satan, He was tested for 3 excruciating, agonizing hours on the Cross, we can place our sufferings and temptations in light of His. We can get strength from Him.

It’s an emotional exercise, more than anything else, but then again when we are suffering through trials and temptations, our emotions are engaged and our higher rational thinking is absent.

Look upon the Cross.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)