You will not be tried beyond your strength

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Quite often in 12 Step meetings and elsewhere it is said that “God will not allow you to be tried or tested beyond your strength or limits.”

It is Scriptural, therefore reliable and true.

1 Corinthians 10:13: No trial has come to you but what is human. God is faithful and will not let you be tried beyond your strength; but with the trial he will also provide a way out, so that you may be able to bear it.

(Via USCCB NABRE.)

All of our trials are the result of human error and folly. Our lack of cooperation with God’s will introduces friction in our lives, and our human frailty and selfishness furthermore mucks up the works. God permits these things to happen due to His respect for our free will and for the opportunity for us to accept these crosses as proof of our discipleship. We screw up, we turn to Him.

One thing I did not know was the part about “…He will also provide a way out, so that you may be able to bear it.” This is even more comforting. The answer lies within the problem. His hand is somewhere in there guiding us, we have to just see it and reach out.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Clearing your mind of distractions

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There was a commercial that ran on American TV a decade ago. I do not remember for what product. Anyway, it featured Phil Jackson, the Head Coach of the Los Angeles Lakers, as a cab driver. Some high-powered looking lawyer/executive couple (man and woman) had simultaneously climbed into the back seat of his cab and gave differing destinations. If I recall, they were confused about them. Cabbie Phil spouted a New-Agey philosophical observation on “Clearing your mind of all distractions and focusing on the business at hand is pivotal.” (I wrote it down as I was in early sobriety and was keen on extracting bits of wisdom from any source. I copied it into my Big Book.)

Some other time, doesn’t matter when as I watched re-runs of it whenever I could, I saw an episode of “Star Trek: The Next Generation” entitled Birthright, Part II (Via Memory Alpha, the Star Trek Wiki.) In it, there is a scene in which Lt. Worf is doing the “mok’bara”, which I always took to be Klingon Tai chi chuan (Via Wikipedia.). As he is explaining the practice, he says “The form clears the mind, and centers the body.” (I wrote that down too, in my Big Book. Still in early sobriety at the time.)

Perhaps developing a ritual in that which is important come first: Matthew 6:33: “Seek ye therefore first the kingdom of God, and his justice, and all these things shall be added unto you.” (Via DRBO.)

Begin the day with prayer and meditation (See: Keeping Your Head on Straight, Part 1 (Regular Daily Prayer) and Keeping Your Head on Straight, Part 2 (Regular Daily Prayer)) Then write and blog for however long until the feeling of “being productive” hits.

Save email, RSS feeds and daily news reviewing as well as social network checking in for some time AFTER a measure of blogging and writing have been done. Same goes for all the “tools” for getting organized. Look at those at the end of the day to get an idea of what the next day holds and then glance at them after the hour or so of creative work.

The “form” clears the mind of all distractions and centers the body, so that focusing on the business at hand is possible. Huh. Maybe.

I just wrote Faithful in small matters. This is sort of a follow-up.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Faithful in small matters

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I am struggling with a few things. (So what else is new?) If I were to time travel back a few years and report on this to a past self this would be a little surprising to that old self given that I am more successful in life now than I had been in any previous period.

The main thing I am struggling with is time for my writing and blogging. I have a full-time job consisting of four shifts, each of ten hours. Add to that the time for the commute and a nice home life, four days out of my week are accounted for. The remaining three days never seem like enough to do what I need and want. “Wow! I have 3 days off!” Real life things seem to crop up, as they do for everyone. This isn’t a complaint, just an observation. I actually like real life. It is just a bit messy. My real life has a lot of neat things in it that kind of get in the way of my creative efforts. But real writers and bloggers have that stuff going on, too, and they seem to have time for their creative work.

Two words: “Time management”.

I can do better with that. One thing I had contemplated was changing jobs (never easy for me) to one that is a more normal one of 5, eight hour days.

But the thought occurred to me that this would give me just more time to do non-writing things. “Work expands to fill the time allotted it” is a saying I found sometime ago. I think it is also true that “anything” expands to fill the time allotted it. Or, the conflicting thought that in working 5 days I would have one more day to be too tired from work and not write or blog that day, either, as well as having real life stuff take up more of the two remaining days.

I can be complicated, especially in regards to time.

Which comes back to those two words: “time management”.

So, how to do that? There’s all sorts of “Getting Things Done” courses and computer applications to help you better organize your time. Yeah, like they would work for me.

I was in Eucharistic Adoration (my weekly Holy Hour) and the following scriptural passage drifted across my brain:

Matthew 25:21: “His master said to him, ‘Well done, my good and faithful servant. Since you were faithful in small matters, I will give you great responsibilities. Come, share your master’s joy.'”

(Via USCCB.)

It was the ending of the parable of the talents, in which a Master gave 3 servants different amounts of money, 2 of them did well with the gifts and were rewarded with more, one failed and was punished.

So, in thinking of that, I decided that time can be treated in this manner. Make the most out of the gift of time that you have and do not squander it. I am aware that this is no stunningly original realization, millions have latched onto this notion as a motivating factor to do things before they run out of time. But this is from a Christian angle. We are given a limited amount of time on Earth. We are all called to do God’s will and to help establish the kingdom of God here on Earth. Treat time as a currency that we invest in building God’s kingdom on Earth so that ultimately we are rewarded with the greeting from the passage.

Rather than asking for more time to do certain things like write and blog, perhaps instead I shall endeavor to make the best use of the time I already have. Maybe in doing this, a better job opportunity may somehow present itself to me in which I will have subsequently more hours to write and blog. (Such as online writing work that pays?)

I am not treating this as an “if/then” statement. Like: “If I write more with the time I already have available, then God will give me a better job.” That’s simplistic and formulaic. But perhaps the more disciplined life that results from this will have a correspondingly more productive effect on other areas of life, especially writing and blogging.

This isn’t the first time I’ve tried “time management”, but perhaps things were too chaotic for my meager attempts before. Life is somewhat more stable (relatively speaking). Anyway, as long as one always picks oneself up after a fall, failure can’t be conceded.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

“Second Chance Lent” is Coming Up!

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This is just a reminder that this Saturday marks the Church’s Feast of the Transfiguration of the Lord. This means that another 40 day period of penance and conversion, albeit an informal an unofficial one, starts on August 6th. This is what I am now calling “Second Chance Lent,” just in case you fell short of your penitential and conversion goals for the real Lent earlier this year, you have another opportunity in a few days.

I got this idea from a source I have long forgotten (some Catholic thinker in some daily devotional mentioned it). The Feast of the Transfiguration, based on the Lord’s conversation with Moses and Elijah on Mt. Tabor regarding His upcoming trial and Crucifixion, is 40 days before the Feast of the Triumph of the Cross on September 14th.

Information on this Feast is here:

Triumph of the Cross

(Via Catholic Culture.)

And so the Church in Her wisdom established these feast days 40 days apart to enable the faithful to have another season to focus on repentance and spiritual growth. I hardly think this is coincidental. Go to Confession and Daily Mass if possible (or as often as you can). Focus on your relationship with the Lord and how you’ve harmed it by sin. Repent and believe in the Gospel.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Thoughts on recovery social networking

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Last week I shut down the “Recovery for Christ” social network for lack of interest. I have not given up on an online interactive community for Catholics recovering from addictions, but it will have to wait while interest is rebuilt.

To that end, there is an alternative, maybe a temporary one. Google has started a new social network called “Google Plus.” The “Plus” may eventually be a rival to Facebook. It has a lot of the same features as Facebook, but with one chief difference: “Circles.” Circles are a way to organize your contact list, but unlike Facebook’s method of grouping friend lists, on G+ you can target their lists with posts and other sharing. In other words, when you post something to G+, you have the option of sharing it with only a few friends.

With this lies the possibility of G+ members having Circles of friends for specific purposes, such as for online recovery work. People can connect with each other and freely share their struggles with a select few.

So far, G+ is by invitation only. If you are not a member and want an invite, email me through this blog and I’ll send you one. Be sure to include an email address. (My blog’s email address is a different Google account than the one I use for G+) If you are already a G+ member, contact me through here and we’ll link up there!

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Faith and Transitions

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Over the past few months there have been a number of ongoing transitions in my life. Changes at work and such were particularly debilitating, and I feared the ability to cope with it all. This is just a short post as I am testing something out with this blog, and I just needed to quickly state something simple and obvious. That if it wasn’t for my faith might not have made it through as well as I did. I used the “trials” as a way to learn about myself and my relationship with God, and how through prayer, you really do establish a partnership with the Lord.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Recovery for Christ is shutting down

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The Recovery for Christ social network for Catholics recovering from alcoholism and addictions will be shutting down as of July 19th, when the domain name registration expires.

I am sorry for any inconvenience, but my heart was no longer in it. And whatever assistance I had at times was about as enthusiastic as I was! I am by no means complaining, I take most of the blame as I didn’t work as hard at it as I could have or should have.

It was the right thing, perhaps gone about the wrong way. Maybe by the wrong person (me). At least I met several fine people with whom I will continue online relationships. But Recovery for Christ will be dead in just over a week. The Holy Spirit knows what’s best and inspires people to do God’s will. If things are of God, they endure, if they are purely human, they fail.

A social network is only as good as the willingness of people in the network to socialize. An online community of lurkers is not a community.

There would be the occasional burst of activity, and then a roaring silence. I would log in after some period of inactivity, only to find that someone had been on a few days before, begging for help. There was no one, myself included, around to hear that voice screaming into the night, asking for help. There was another time when I was on and a woman had engaged me in a chat and told me about her rape. It caused a relapse. I had emailed several female members hoping to enlist their aid, but none ever showed up over the next few days. I assisted her as best I could. I had hoped that she’d get better help from female members, but nothing came.

For a while there were attempts to organize online chat meetings, staggered about the week to accommodate people. They never came to fruition, beyond the 1-3 at most usually in attendance.

This all gradually sucked enthusiasm.

I had many plans, but never got around to implementing them. This is why I take the most blame.

I may revive it someday, but I will try and go about it in a different way. I will perhaps attempt to solicit support in the blogosphere instead of going it alone. I’m thinking that through blogging and such, myself and others can develop a possible interest, and then recruit people who will develop/run/admin/patrol/moderate from the start. Maybe in that manner it will gain the Lord’s blessing and grow and endure. If that does not happen, then perhaps there isn’t a need for an online community like a social network for Catholics in recovery.

I have always wondered why there wasn’t anything like the network, why there are far more non-denominational forums and networks and practically no Catholic ones. And the Catholic Church is the Church with the sacraments of healing. Perhaps therein lies the answer.  With the Eucharist and Confession, perhaps Catholics have no real need for an ongoing Catholic-focused recovery program. This can be discussed in any future revival.

But now I just do not have the time. Between my regular day job, this blog and other projects, I cannot give this project the time it needs.

Anyway, as I said, the network might rise again, when I and others can do it properly. I don’t want it to be “my” site, there would be no point. History will just repeat itself if the network started up again as an individual effort. I would prefer to be just one of several admins, part of a group effort.

I should have all 290ish email addresses from the members, so if/when a successor is a go, there’s a potential member list and people will be contacted. If you wish to be on the mailing list, email me. The email addresses for me are along the sidebar.

This blog will live on. Only Recovery for Christ is closing.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Independence Day

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A rare "gratitude" post. In the United States today we are celebrating our Independence from Great Britain. They fought long and hard to rid themselves the "People" (British troops and tax collectors), "Places" (far off island governing this Continent), and "Things" (unjust taxation, lack of political representation) that were wrong our their’ lives. And so now we have 235 years of Independence.

We are grateful for that. Although things are not, putting it mildly, all that great in the USA today regardless of one’s political persuasion, our Independence is largely still in our own hands.

Anyone who has been sober and clean for any length of time hopefully remembers the dark days of dependency on their chemical of choice. The "People, Places and Things" of that life are long past, with very little desire to return.

How much control do you have over your sobriety? What do you do to maintain your independence, or do you take it for granted that it will always be present? Twelve Step meetings? The Church and the Sacraments, as well as a prayer life? Service and volunteering?

Be mindful and keep watch.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Crucible of Faith

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Earlier this month I wrote: Just enough. This is a sequel.

The reason I am writing this sequel is that I need to expound somewhat on the “suffering” aspect of that post. Although you might think that there would be increased confidence in relying on Divine Providence, there is a lag time between when the suffering (worrying) begins and when you realize that you are getting “just enough.” The lag time varies, perhaps from situation to situation and from person to person. It all depends on the strength of your Faith and how often in the past you have allowed suffering to strengthen it.

We have two spiritual options when faced with suffering. We can reject it or accept it. The World tells us to reject it. The spiritually ignorant or weak will feel that God should reward the faithful, as if that is proof of His love. These people perhaps do not discipline their children or admonish friends all that much. Suffering is painful, pain is bad and should be avoided.

Or we can accept, for as Christians we are called to follow Christ, since He said:

Luke 9:23: “Then he said to all, “If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.”

To deny ourselves sounds like we must essentially run counter to our basic instinct of self-preservation. Suffering threatens our survival, and so therefore we must shun it. But we are not animals, subject to instinct, we are made in the image and likeness of God and as “…God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, so that everyone who believes in him might not perish but might have eternal life,” (John 3:16) so we must reflect that love in return and trust in Him, like a child trusts in his or her earthly father.

The pain and uncertainty of material want, such as financial worries of various kinds, has a very debilitating effect on faith. Faith is not material, it can’t feed you physical food or pay the bills. It can feed you and provide courage for tough times, but as I stated earlier, there may be that lag time before it kicks in. And how do you get through that lag time, when your faith is threatened by overwhelming worries and concerns?

Anyone can have strong faith when things are going well. It isn’t hard to trust in God and have faith that things will be all right when they already are. It is when you are struggling to pay the bills, the truck and SUV need repairing (and both are old), and housing expenses are perhaps out of reach… in these times try to keep the faith.

These times can serve as a crucible, a forge or winepress that purifies and strengthens the faith. Purify it from all insincerity and falsehood, or refining it for some divine purpose. Strengthen it for tough times ahead (the World is increasingly unfriendly to Christianity in general, and Catholicism in particular).

Psalm 66:10: “You tested us, O God, tried us as silver tried by fire.”

1 Peter 1:7: “In this you rejoice, although now for a little while you may have to suffer through various trials, so that the genuineness of your faith, more precious than gold that is perishable even though tested by fire, may prove to be for praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.”

We can cut and run when it gets tough, when our daily troubles feel overwhelming and no end appears in sight. We can abandon our Faith and resort to unethical or immoral solutions to our problems, or if not that then destroy the relationships about us with our fear, anger and anxiety.

Or we can offer it up to God, take it one day at a time, assume He is in charge despite the mess and grow as people. Men develop the masculine strength to bear the burden and “slay the terror” and be the emotional rock upon which others can depend on, and women can see this as a time to become even more nurturing and caring in order to assist others around them to maintain a sense of peace and stability.

It is not easy accomplishing this, it takes time and perseverance. And a refusal to reject suffering. Perseverance will help you also later in life on your deathbed.

Faith can help keep your wits about you when all others are losing theirs.

Matthew 6:19-21,24-27: “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and decay destroy, and thieves break in and steal. But store up treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor decay destroys, nor thieves break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there also will your heart be.

“No one can serve two masters. He will either hate one and love the other, or be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon. Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat (or drink), or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds in the sky; they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are not you more important than they? Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span?”

You cannot ignore these problems. Like I said in the “Just Enough” post, “It does NOT mean that you pray for something and “BOING!” you get it.” You have to work for it, plan for it. But you have a partner, and that is God. He works in partnership with us, and with others. We do not know everything that is going on. A solution to your time of troubles could be developing as you read this and suddenly present itself.

Philippians 4:6-7: “Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”

I think in the context of this post that “the peace… that surpasses all understanding” is what keeps you faith strong and your wits about you.

You are not alone:

1 Peter 5:7-10: “Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you. Be sober and vigilant. Your opponent the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion looking for (someone) to devour. Resist him, steadfast in faith, knowing that your fellow believers throughout the world undergo the same sufferings. The God of all grace who called you to his eternal glory through Christ (Jesus) will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you after you have suffered a little.”

You suffer, and will recover. You will get through it. Somehow. Any alcoholic and addict reading this should understand.

Be “steadfast in faith, knowing that your fellow believers throughout the world undergo the same sufferings.”

May the peace of Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ be with you all.

All Scripture quotes courtesy: USCCB.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

A Guide for Confession

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As someone who hasn’t been to Confession in nearly 2 months or so, due to a change in my job schedule which has me working on Saturdays, (the most popular time for the Sacrament), I am posting this for other readers who are thinking of going to Confession (but are fearful – it’s not so bad!)

A Guide for Confession

(Via Catholic Online.)

Me, I have to find non-traditional weekday times, or schedule an appointment with a priest. I usually went every 3 weeks, give or take a week. Regular and frequent Confession is excellent for one’s spiritual progression.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)