Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 7

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Yesterday during the sixth day of this novena, I wrote about forgiveness. Today the subject is a related issue, that of resentment.

Resentment it is said, means “to feel again”. We alcoholics all understand this. When we resent something we are reliving the event all over, we nurture the emotion and maintain the grudge against the person who harmed us.

This is obviously harmful. It continues to keep open the wound inflicted upon our psyche and it hinders our spiritual progression. Our hearts are hardened and therefore we cannot hear the still, small voice of God speaking to us.

There is an AA slogan: “Let go and let God”. Basically it means to let go of whatever it is that has gotten you trapped and let God take care of it.

On the surface this would seem to be like shirking responsibility and “passing the buck”, except that it is God I am speaking about here and we are His children. Like any good parent, He seeks to heal us and protect us if we but ask Him. He will heal us of the pain in His time, meaning we end up learning something from the experience and grow closer to Him. If the pain was removed right away, my experience tells me that it will return and nothing was gained from the whole event.

As always, the Blessed Mother is there to help:

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: this is a repost from last year

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 6

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We all bear grudges at one time or another. Someone has wronged us, either by a real infraction or a perceived one, and we are hurt. There is a wound on our psyche and we suffer. The hurt remains and we are tied to the person and the event by this feeling. This is maintained by being unforgiving.

Forgiveness cuts these ties. By forgiving the person of the wrong they have perpetrated against us we release ourselves from the anchor that hinders our spiritual development.

Some people, myself included, feel that withholding forgiveness denies victory to the perpetrator. We feel that we have the upper hand, the moral high ground in the conflict. Truth is, quite often the perpetrator doesn’t remember the action, doesn’t care about the event and may even be not guilty of any wrongdoing. The only person suffering is the victim. Not always, but even when the grudge is justified, holding onto it only perpetuates the original act. It is as if there just wasn’t one harmful act, but a succession.

We can heal ourselves by forgiving the person, either outright through contact with that person, or just in our own minds. We release ourselves from the event and the harm it had caused. The effects may not be immediate, but healing will occur over time.

There are additional posts on forgiveness on this blog, just go to the “Labels”section in the sidebar and click on “Forgiveness”.

The Blessed Mother is always ready to assist us:

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: repost from last year

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 5

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Patience is a condition that we alcoholics have serious issues with. And these issues can continue well into our sobriety. It seems as if we can never ever fully get rid of the “I want what I want and I want it now” attitude, no matter how much we have worked on developing our sense of patience.

“Lord, give me patience, and make it QUICK!”

It can be argued that impatience is a secret desire to be like God. Only God has control over time, and impatience is a desire for control over time. Time doesn’t move fast enough, events do not take place when we want them to. Things take too long to finish. The present time is never enough, we want the future, too.

This is of course futile and only leads to anger and frustration, two emotions that we alcoholics cannot afford. We lose our self-control and get knocked “off the beam” and our sobriety is at risk.

Developing a patient attitude takes time. A person in recovery who has a good sense of self and a good knowledge of their interior life can learn over time all those emotional and situational triggers which set off an impatience binge and then learn to counter them. Merely recognizing when they occur is often enough to quiet them down. Not always, but given the practice, the intellectual and spiritual sides of the person will be able to tame the impatient streak.

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: reposted from last year

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 4

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Grief. Mourning the death of a loved one and dealing with how to fill the hole created in your life by the loss may be the biggest threat to an alcoholic’s sobriety.

The grand theological concepts of Faith such as an afterlife and a possible reunion with the beloved in Heaven only if you both have died in the grace of God might cause this to be an insurmountable situation for some. If just swept under the rug and avoided it becomes a landmine lying in the road of recovery we are trudging along.

Death. The landscape of your life has changed. The person is gone and is never coming back. One constant piece of advice offered in recovery is that you need to change how you react to things. This is fine for most events. Death is the one unavoidable and unalterable event. It happens to everyone. It will happen to you. How you react to it fundamentally defines your relationship with God and how strong your faith is.

If your religious and spiritual faith is strong and death is an accepted part of living, then you will cope with the loss in a manner that may ensure your sobriety’s survival. If you hadn’t encountered death yet, but have a healthy, viable and ongoing means of conversion (i.e. you’re into “spiritual progression”) you will have it rough as you adjust to this new thing, but you’ll survive. You may not want to, but you will. It is almost as if you are back at that “jumping off place”, that area in your drinking career when you’re at bottom and you know that drinking leads to death, and not-drinking may only bring a wish for death.

You learn that grief is not something to be avoided, but used. Grief is something you plow through, not work around.

As in other times, but perhaps more in this situation than in any other, the Blessed Mother is ready and able to help.

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: Reposted from last year.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 3

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Depression is another affliction for us alcoholics, especially in early recovery. With our moods swinging wildly from day to to day, and sometimes more quickly, we fall into a state of wondering “will it ever get better?” It becomes easy to lose hope and to wonder whether this sobriety thing is worth it if an emotional roller coaster is the cost.

A dark cloud seems to follow us and we drift from meeting to meeting to seek a means to snap out of it. We see others with more long-term sobriety than ours and we “want what they have”, but we want it now. And gloom sets in when we see the long road ahead that we need to trudge to get where they are.

It passes as easily at it arrived, this depression. We eventually learn that it is a normal part of the landscape of our minds, and eventually we endure. It does not make it any easier, nevertheless we develop the strength to see it through and our fortitude pervades our life.

The Blessed Virgin Mary, ever our watchful and protective mother, is ready to assist:

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: This is a re-post from last year

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 2

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Anxiety is another cross that we alcoholics have to bear. Fears and worries about the future or about present circumstances and the apparent powerlessness over them leads to anxiety.

Anxiety happens when faith is weak or absent. We lack the confidence that God is there to help us or provide for us, and we feel we are cast adrift. Our inability to deal with things in the past had pushed us to drinking as a means to cope, and now without that crutch anxiety fills the gap.

Anxiety fills the empty spaces where love and faith should abide.

At Mass is the following dialogue after the Lord’s Prayer:

Priest: Deliver us, Lord, from every evil, and grant us peace in our day. In your mercy keep us free from sin and protect us from all anxiety as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior, Jesus Christ.

Via Catholic Resources.)

One of the little-known effects of the Mass is that it is a weapon against anxiety. If we are the faithful servants of our Lord then we should be confident that the One who died for us will not let us stumble and fall beyond His reach.

The Mass is the drama of God’s love for us. Immerse yourself in it. (Helpful if you are a member of a parish with a reverent priest who says the Mass properly.)

Pray:

Oh ever Immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: this is a re-post from last year

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Our Lady of Lourdes Novena for Alcoholics: Day 1

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We are all individuals. Sometimes our sense of individuality gets unhealthy and and is replaced by a feeling of aloneness. We feel isolated and no longer a part of whatever community or communities we belong to. This separation is distinctly harmful and will lead to all sorts of thoughts about our well-being that are untrue. Our problems are worse that anybody else’s. No one likes me. No one notices me, I am invisible.

No one suffers with us.

We somehow must re-establish our connections with those around us and reassert our balanced perspective as to how we are in relation to others.

Prayer is one way. Prayer, that seeking out conscious contact with God and uplifting our hearts and minds to Him reconnects us to the Divine, and in turn helps us to be aware that we are not truly alone. God is there and He softens our hearts and assists us in seeing those about us.

In this novena, we turn to Our Blessed Mother and request her intercessory powers to aid us in our healing. We can turn to her and ask that our feelings of aloneness be banished when they arise.

Pray:

Oh ever immaculate Virgin, Mother of Mercy, Health of the Sick, Refuge of Sinners, Comfortess of the Afflicted, you know my wants, my troubles, my sufferings. Look upon me with mercy. When you appeared in the grotto of Lourdes, you made it a privileged sanctuary where you dispense your favors, and where many sufferers have obtained the cure of their infirmities, both spiritual and corporal. I come, therefore, with unbounded confidence to implore your maternal intercession. My loving Mother, obtain my request. I will try to imitate your virtues so that I may one day share your company and bless you in eternity. Amen

From: Prayers – Catholic Online: “Prayer to Our Lady of Lourdes”

NOTE: This was published last year.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

Novena to Our Lady of Lourdes for Alcoholics

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On February 11 is the Feast of Our Lady of Lourdes. It honors the 1858 apparitions of the Blessed Virgin Mary to Bernadette Soubirous in Lourdes, France. Along with the apparition at Fatima, Portugal, it is one of the best known of Marian apparitions. Even non-Catholics have heard of it due to miraculous healings of people immersed in the waters of its springs. This article from New Advent contains the basic information Lourdes.

I will re-post the Novena I published last year.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

How often do you pray and go to Church? Part 5 (Conclusion)

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In the previous four posts of this series I wrote about the things in the Catholic Faith that a Catholic can use to live a life that could be free of alcohol and drugs.

“Catholic” means universal. A catholic life derived from the Catholic Faith would mean using all of the resources of the Faith in guiding and ordering a life. This would include using it in your struggle to stay clean and sober. It would mean that Catholic Christianity molds and guides your thoughts and actions, and what strengthens you to get through each day. Everything that I mentioned in the previous 4 posts can help guide or order your day. Just as alcohol and drugs were used “back in the day” to get through things and how the addiction was the source and summit of life, so too can Catholicism be the new priority in life. And a free and liberated life, at that.

Here is a sample day (obviously a rough sketch of a possible Catholic life. But the notion is there. Some variant is possible for everyone):

You awaken. Instead of staring at the ceiling or wall resentful at having survived the night, or trying to remember what happened the last time you saw the day, you are pretty well refreshed from a good sleep. You thank the Lord for a good night, and seek His guidance for the day.

“Lord, not my will, but Yours be done.”

(Your morning routine is set, whatever it is concerning breakfast and morning beverage.) But now it is time to devote to God. You pray a Morning Offering and a few other set prayers, then reach for the Bible and start your daily lectio divina. This spiritual meditative exercise fortifies you, as the Word of God jump starts your mind. As like your first few daily shots of alcohol set a fire to you after your first waking moments back then, now it is Scripture that gives you a focus.

This meditation completed, your get your Divine Office and pray the first section, the “Office of Readings.”

You get ready for the day, and take your Breviary with you (either the book or your cell if it is on your mobile 🙂 ) You head for Daily Mass en route to work. Prior to Mass, while sitting in Church, you read the Morning Prayer section of the Breviary. Usually there may be a connection to the Daily Mass readings.

Mass begins… you listen intently to the prayers and responses and the Readings, and you do not recite things, you pray them. You understand the Mass. Jesus is here.

Off to work, the Lord still within you as you had received Communion. Your commute is long enough so that you have enough time to pray the Rosary while driving (or sitting in public transit.) You prefer this to the raucous noise of morning radio. You don’t want the world to intrude, just yet. You let your mind go over the Mysteries of the day for the Rosary, and you think about their meaning. You get to work. You go about your morning.

Lunchtime. Time for Daytime Prayer. You turn to the prayers for mid-day and read them in the Breviary. Perhaps you also read the Breviary during a morning break, or maybe just a selection from a pocket New Testament. Nevertheless, you now punctuate your workday with Scripture and prayer, rather than swigs from a concealed bottle containing vodka (vodka because it is “odorless and leaves no taste on your breath.” Yeah, right.) Prayer and the Word of God gives you the strength and courage to make it through work.

Time to leave, you go home. Dinner, and now Evening Prayer from the Breviary. The evening is ahead of you. Drinking is not on the agenda, the thought hasn’t even crossed your mind.

Anyway, as you prepare for bed, you review the day, as you will be doing an examination of conscience with the Breviary’s “Night Prayer.” You review and recall any sins of commission and omission.

Night Prayer said, you go to sleep.

“Into Your hands, Father, I commend my spirit.”

The point of this series and its Conclusion is to underscore that as much as one drank in the past, there is a prayerful and Scriptural counterpoint to that life. Catholic beliefs and religious practices, from Mass attendance to prayer to devotions such as the Rosary, can provide a consummate life that envelopes you. Your mind will be re-programmed to not require a drink to cope. While a 12 Step or some other recovery program can provide some tools to help you cope, these sometimes run the danger of preventing you from seeking the fullness of the Faith that Jesus established in Earth. They may be the “easier, softer way,” but as Jesus said the road to Heaven passes through the narrow gate. Things that distract you, that deflect your eyes from the prize, should be discarded or put into their proper place. Heaven is your goal on the “Road of Happy Destiny.” Scriptural passages studies and learned, examples from the lives of the Saints can give you the boost and support needed to counter the dark ways of the world, or at least assist you in maintaining a healthy balance and perspective.

Adding the study of the Catechism of the Catholic Church (“CCC”), and there is an excellent resource to “validate” your choices. I never even mentioned the CCC in this series, but it is the best companion to the Bible out there. Full of objective truth gleaned from Scripture and the writings of the Popes and Saints, the CCC helps “fortify” you in ways few things can, next to the Bible.

They can give you the tools needed for you to you react differently to things, whereas in the past you relied on alcohol, and now perhaps on meeting dependency and slogans, Scriptural passages and the CCC can be the “ammunition” to fire back at the stuff life throws at you.

Lessons learned from studying Truth.

This is freedom, this is liberation. Instead of being a slave to alcohol and drugs, you are your own person. True freedom isn’t in doing whatever you want, with little thought to the consequences to yourself or to others. True freedom lies in being the best person that you can be, the person God intended you to be. Your true self. That is what you should Recover.

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)

How often do you pray and go to Church? Part 4

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In Part 3 of this series I discussed the Breviary and the Rosary. Now… the Bible!

The Bible is the Word of God. Jesus is the Word made human. The Bible is Jesus and Jesus is the Bible. The Old Testament pointed the way to Jesus, the New Testament revealed Him. To not study the Bible is to not study Jesus. St. Jerome, the Early Church Father who translated the Bible into Latin from the original Greek and Hebrew stated that “Ignorance of the Bible is ignorance of Christ.”

In the first 4 centuries of Christianity, the Bishops of the Western and Eastern branches of the Catholic Church put the Bible together. The Bible is a Catholic document.

There is a way to read the Bible that is enriching and if successful (meaning you are patient, persistent and persevering) will bring you much closer to God that most other forms of prayer. I have not been able to master it yet despite trying a few times. This method of reading the Bible is called “Lectio Divina.” It is a slow, prayerful, meditative reading of Sacred Scripture in which the Bible itself pulls you along, and thus you “hear” the Word of God speak to you, as in a whisper to your soul.

This is a classic online explanation/how-to of lectio divina:

Introduction to Lectio Divina

I have a new book! "The Sober Catholic Way" is a handbook on how anyone can live a sober life, drawn from over 17 years of SoberCatholic posts! It's out now on "Amazon," "Apple Books," "B&N" and and others!"!

My two other books are still available! "The Stations of the Cross for Alcoholics" and "The Recovery Rosary: Reflections for Alcoholics and Addicts" (Thank you!!)